SYNOPSIS
In 2067, the world is in turmoil. People fight for rights,
countries for resources. A free-spirited CIA agent learns the
secret of ending the turmoil at the cost of a dire omen.
STORY
About to be rejuvenated from 70 to 30, Auntie wants her aging
parrot to be rejuvenated, as well. She asks Baudolino, her
nephew, to release the bird amongst the young cockatoos of
the Amazonian jungle while on a CIA mission to Lima.
Lima is rife with violent riots. Teenagers rally for access
to governmental power and mature people for freedom to
ransack Amazon's gold. At the restaurant in Lima, the
prospective recruit, lame son of the President, rants against
his younger stepbrother, the favorite of the President.
At the hotel, while Baudolino reviews the analytics of the
recorded meeting, the parrot gets excited by streamed videos
of the jungle's cockatoos. Moved by the bird's emotional
display, Baudolino takes the bird into the depth of the
Amazonian jungle.
At the camp of a Nahua tribe, Pyramid Head shaman turns out
to be a woman. Impressed by the pyramidal shape of the cage
and the aging parrot, she offers to disclose the secret of
ending the world's turmoil. The secret comes with an omen
though; Bardolino will have to walk in life two feet above
the ground or die. He smirks about the omen and, under the
spell of Ayahuasca, learns the secret of Universal Harmony:
Laughter!
The next day, he wakes up with fits of laughter at the
laughing secret. But witnesses the death of an ethnographer
who was subject to a similar omen.
Back in Seattle, strapped in a wheelchair, he is fired from
C.I.A. At the house of the rejuvenated bossy aunt, his
friend, an agency higher-up, offers him an unofficial
undercover job in Somaliland, just to clear his mind. At
those times, Somaliland had become a monarchy, and Saudi
Arabia, India, and Japan compete for rare metals mining
concessions. Bedouin families support different competitors,
and Baudolino is to deliver protective sonic equipment to a
Huda clan. His wheelchair and the Unlimited Friendship
Organization - U.F.O. - charitable foundation promoting camel
milking equipment and milk derivatives would be excellent
mission covers.
In Somaliland, he delivers the goods. During a sonic atack
the family flees and he is left stranded in the desert.
Deafened by the attack, and with the laptop and phone busted,
he manages to get to the gate of a convent.
He spends two days in the scorching heat until the nuns
decide to give him temporary shelter. The nuns are actually
sisters in a highly diverse ethnic and religious belief
group.
Domino, the prioress, is puzzled by his ability to walk on
stilts and skillfully shut down attacking sonic drones, is
spite of his implied disability. Not curious about his story
nor interested in "knowing him better," she ignores his
pointed intimate advances.
On a vesper night, he witnesses the trance of a black punk
sister who has the vision of Black Madonna's prophecy about
the harmony of humanity. And what is the key to that?
Laughter!
The temporary shelter is long overdue, and Baudolino is about
to get on the truck to Djibouti. At the last moment, the
prioress changes her mind. "I'm curious!" she says.
He finally tells her who he actually is and the sha-woman's
secret and omen. The prioress is struck by the similarity
between the sha-woman's secret and sister's prophecy.
She lures him into a heathen omen dispel, helped by two
sisters. The dispel works. She wants now to make secret of
the omen and the prophesy of the punk sister public. To end
the doom of those times. To start an Era of Universal
Consciousness Harmony.
They reveal the secret and prophesy at an Eschatology
conference. Their presentation is deemed "True!" The audience
of the conference laughs, the people on the street laugh, the
laughter spreads throughout the whole world. Words and riots
stop.
On New Year's Eve of 2079, the capitals of the world
celebrate the Universal Harmony.
In Beijing, the Russia-Chinese federation. Robots march and
laugh in cadence.
In Paris, French people dance in American in-line fork
dancing and celebrate their love for Americans.
In New-York, Miss Canada-America-Mexico - CANAMEX federation
launches the Ball above the dancers waving "Twerk not Work"
banners. On the skid raw, a woman laughs at an emoji which
laughs back at her "Ha! Ha! Laugh at that!"
INT. HOSPITAL - REJUVENATING ROOM - DAY
A faint antiseptic tang hangs in the cold, filtered air. The
low hum of refrigeration units merges with the soft beep-beep
of medical equipment.
A gloved hand taps the FUTURE AGE control box. Numbers climb
from "00" to "35". Beside it, CURRENT AGE steady at "75."
TECHNICIAN ONE, sealed in a transparent hermetic coverall,
BLISS KLEANIK logo across the back, reviews the treatment
schedule on HUD #1.
ON HUD #1: Steady-state medical data. Dynamic plots refresh.
Blinking prompts. Digital clocks. Control boxes marked DAY
ONE through DAY SEVEN.
He taps on DAY ONE, light on. Underneath, CRYOGENIC CYCLES,
INHALATIONS, and INTRAVENOUS counters populate with numbers,
lists of medications and chemical formulas.
He turns to -- TECHNICIAN TWO, identical coveralls, who's
eyes are locked on HUD #2.
ON HUD #2: A 3D HUMAN ANATOMY model with colored dots and a
DNA HELIX. A digital rendering of a REJUVENATION EXCLOSURE on
a BASEPLATE. THIN COLORED LINES connect anatomy dots to the
DNA, and THICK LINES to the baseplate.
Technician Two turns toward the treatment room.
In the middle of it, the REJUVENATION ENCLOSURE. A
transparent two-halves cylinder, top half open, mounted on a
BASEPLATE.
Inside, AUNTIE (70s), wrinkled, sunken cheeks, PATCH-SENSORS
stuck on her shaved head, WIRELESS BUDS blinking on her ears.
Covered by a shiny BAIR HUGGER BLANKET, she browses on a
TABLET clamped to the enclosure's edge. She is a control
freak of anybody and everything, including her own age.
TUBES and WIRE BUNDELS snake from the baseplate to her body,
up through the blanket and the open lid, up to and along the
ceiling cable trays toward the HUDs.
Medical UV LIGHTS and DISPLAY MONITORS hang above the
enclosure.
Technician Two reviews data on a tablet.
ON TABLET: wired schematics, marks, data.
He switches a couple of the color-coded wires' pins on the
baseplate's connecting ports.
A MIRROR on the side of the room turns to transparent.
BAUDOLINO (30s), the witty nephew of Auntie, waves from
behind the window. He is a humanizer driven off from the
spying duty by curiosity. And he'd rather laugh at than take
things seriously.
Auntie's wireless buds blink. She taps on a tablet app.
ON TABLET: BLISS KLEANIK website. Photos of before and after
rejuvenation. "VISITOR" alert blinks. She taps on it.
The monitor above comes to life.
ON MONITOR
Baudolino's smile for the occasion.
VISITOR CUBICLE - CONTINUOUS
Baudolino touches VIDEO, AUDIO icons on the CONTROL PANEL.
Behind him, through the cubicle's one-way window, a row of
similar cubicles along the corridor. People enter into or
exit from them.
BAUDOLINO
(funny)
Auntie-Bounty! So, you'll be
upgraded to a young chick. People
will think that you are my new
girlfriend.
AUNTIE (O.S.)
(through speakers)
Stop calling me Auntie... you...
Bandolion!
(coarse laughter)
REJUVENATING ROOM
Auntie laughs at Baudolino's figure on the monitor -- happy
about the nickname she came up with.
AUNTIE
(serious)
I called you on the double before
you get engulfed in your next...
trick. I want you to --
She stops, distracted.
A human shape bends over the casket. In transparent HEAD-TO
TOE COVERALL, IDed as "YOUTH DOCTOR WOO", DOCTOR WOO (20s),
beautifying make-up over an ugly face, smiles. A marketing
smile.
She is about to talk with Auntie --
ALARM
(repetitive)
Detection. Olfactory bird
chromosome.
-- freezes. Turns threateningly to the technicians.
They decline responsibility. Point at Auntie, then to the
back of the room.
On a medical tray, a PARROT in a the PYRAMIDAL WIRE CAGE.
That's SAILOR, Aunties' old pet. Drooping wings and some bold
spots.
The alarm keeps beeping. Doctor Woo fumes.
SAILOR
(croaked)
Gente del mundo, relax!
Technician One stops the alarm.
VISITOR'S CUBICLE
Baudolino cracks up.
BAUDOLINO
Are you also rejuvenating the old
family member?
REJUVENATING ROOM
AUNTIE
(impatient)
You are. You must release Sailor in
the deep jungle --
She scrolls on the tablet showing -- colorful parrots flying
between trees.
AUNTIE
-- look at these parrots'
havens... Tambopata... young and
beautiful!
VISITOR CUBICLE
BAUDOLINO
(brightly)
Rejuvenate him by exposing him to
young chicks?
AUNTIE (O.S.)
(smartly; through
speakers)
I knew you'd understand --
BAUDOLINO
-- Tombopata, huh? Sorry, no time
to bungle in the jungle! It's just
an in and out... trick.
REJUVENATING ROOM
Doctor Woo bends over the gasket, gently trying to pry
Auntie's tablet away.
Auntie won't let go. Doctor Woo yanks it away. Follows-up
with an unctuous smile. Replicates it to Baudolino.
Doctor Woo chops karate moves at the visitor cubicle and the
parrot.
Baudolino disappears behind the mirror.
Technician One walks toward the door with Sailor.
SAILOR
Mooomaaghhr!
Technician Two closes and locks the enclosure's lid.
Cryogenic mist swirls inside and frosts the glass. Cold vapor
ejects from vents, hissing.
INT. AIRCRAFT - PASSENGER CABIN - DAY
The sunset behind Lima's downtown skyscrapers. The skin of
the aircraft is transparent, except for the reinforcement
trusses.
The "Fasten Your Seat Belts" blinks.
The plane lands with a THUD.
PASSENGERS stand up and open the baggage bins, ignoring the
blinking sign.
Baudolino, in a WHITE LINEN casual suit, yawns and stretches
in his seat.
INT. LIMA AIRPORT - CUSTOMS - DAY
Sailor's covered cage wiggles.
Backpack on, Baudolino carries it in one hand. A metallic
suitcase in the other.
He walks along the backs of heavily armed SECURITY GUARDS.
A long, tortuous line of PEOPLE wait their turn to the CUSTOM
BOOTH.
Some people wear BUBBLEHEAD HELMETS. -- A globe-like,
inflatable holo-foil dome. It deploys from an articulated
collar, includes controls for ventilation, Wi-Fi
connectivity, and a halo-foil display.
At an unmarked door, Baudolino sets his face in front of a
biometric lens. The door unlatches. He pushes it open with
his knee.
CIA SECURITY ROOM - CONTINUOUS
The CIA OFFICER (40s) behind the counter wonders about the
cloth-covered cage.
BAUDOLINO
Business asset.
He lays the cage on the floor and hands over his -- BLUE US
PASSPORT and BLACK WALLET.
The officer takes and fumbles with them under the desk, looks
at a monitor. Types on a keyboard.
He hands over to Baudolino a -- BOLERU BROWN passport and a
CREAM COLORED WALLET.
CIA OFFICER
Bien venidos Paco.
Baudolino walks towards the far end of a long, white, empty,
corridor. Footsteps echo. He exits.
EXT. LIMA AIRPORT - CONTINUOUS
Sudden fracas. POLICE CARS and RIOT CONTROL VEHICLES honk and
beep driving up or down a ramp leading to the bridge above.
On the bridge, PEOPLE run, waving BANNERS. A MOLOTOV COCKTAIL
lands and bursts in flames by one of the police cars.
Baudolino gets in a waiting CAR.
The car drives away bypassing the commotion.
INT/EXT. CAR - NIGHT
Car driving on a street.
A POLICEMAN in riot gear stops it at a BARRICADE.
The driver opens the window and shows his ID. The Policeman
returns the ID an points at an alternative route.
Baudolino exits the car and climbs the stairs of the
"VENTANAS" Hotel.
INT. LIMA - RESTAURANT - LATER
Baudolino enters the restaurant. The noise of the street's
riot subsides. He carries a shoulder bag. Wears a CASUAL
JACKET WITH WHITE HORIZONTAL STRIPES ON SLEEVES. He looks
around.
PATRONS eat at tables and drink at the bar. They kill time
immersed in their MOBILE DEVICES, VR HEADSETS, or
bubbleheads, the latter transparent or reflective.
At the bar, ROBOTIC ARMS pour drinks.
Through the restaurant's NANO-GLASS WINDOW, the rally in
progress.
Above the bar, a MEDIA WALL streams sports, ads, news, and
entertainment.
He recognizes the recruit behind a transparent bubblehead.
BABA BONDIEU (30s), Latino, rimmed thick glasses, the
disgruntled son of Boleru President.
Phone in hand, Baba nods at Baudolino, massages his shoulder
and turns his head towards the rack.
A jacket with TWO WHITE VERTICAL STRIPES on the sleeve
hangs on a hook.
Baudolino scratches his arm under the TWO WHITE HORIZONTAL
STRIPES of his sleeve's jacket. He takes it off and hangs it
next to Baba's.
Baba's face disappears behind the reflective bubblehead.
Baudolino sits at a table a few rows away, facing Baba.
On the table, a DIGITAL DISPLAY with the menu, ads, and TV
channels. He scrolls the menu and orders food and a drink.
He pulls the phone and the collapsed bubblehead from the
shoulder bag. Sets the bubblehead's collar onto his clavicle.
Flips the holo-foil's articulation over the front of his
head.
From the collar's controls, he inflates the bubblehead and
checks the vents. He switches the holo-foil to reflective.
INSIDE BAUDOLINO'S BUBBLE - CONTINUOUS
View of the restaurant through the semi-transparent HOLO-FOIL
DISPLAY. His hands fumble with the phone.
Communication apps pop one by one on the display.
ON DISPLAY: CONTACT, BIOMETRICS, AUDIO & VIDEO RECORDING,
SPEECH TO TEXT, CLOCK "00:00:00".
He nods toward -- Baba's bubblehead.
ON DISPLAY - CONTACT: Pictures of nude women and heavy metal
band shredfest. RECORDING: blinks. CLOCK: Starts from
"20:15:42".
BAUDOLINO
I need to see your face, not your
character... for now.
ON DISPLAY - CONTACT: Pictures changes to Baba's face and
"BABA BONDIEU." BIOMETRICS: Blue mesh on his face.
BAUDOLINO
Hi! Your story's not convincing,
yet.
BABA (V.O.)
How come? Stealing from the
government's treasury to bribe
foreign interests? At the expense
of the hard-working people... not
good enough? No accountability...
no legal charges, punishment levied
against these... special interests?
ON DISPLAY - SPEECH TO TEXT: Text runs. BIOMETRICS: mesh
turns to yellow.
Baudolino shakes his head.
BAUDOLINO
(annoyed)
We know this from the media.
BABA
Nobody knows if the money goes to
bribe others or... or directly to
their own coffers....
Baudolino gets annoyed. Too much fluff.
His attention drifts.
RESTAURANT - CONTINUOUS
A WAITRESS (20s), sexy, low-cut crop top, approaches with
Baudolino's order.
Baudolino scrambles on the phone's apps.
INSIDE BAUDOLINO'S BUBBLE - CONTINUOUS
Apps move aside to make room for the waitress's -- deep
cleavage. His imagination takes off. Breasts magnified by the
holo-foil curvature. CLOCK: slows down and stops at
"21:08:49".
BAUDOLINO'S IMAGINATION
The Japanese version of the Milkshake song. The breasts of a
tall JAPANESE SINGER wag above the flashing sequins of her
cut out crop top. Buttocks swings.
BABA (V.O.)
(faint)
-- and that's the first contract
for gas and oil, 45 billion at
stake, you know, the front and the
back stores.
BACK TO SCENE
Baudolino restores the apps on the display.
ON DISPLAY - CLOCK: runs from "21:10:27."
BAUDOLINO
Great front and back stores...
-- The 45 billion, what? Keep
going.
BABA
My father --
BAUDOLINO
(mocking)
-- went to a bank in Switzerland --
BABA
-- No! He has a draft announcement
to lower voting age rights to 16...
to give more power to...
ON DISPLAY - BIOMETRICS: The mesh turns red.
BABA
(In Spanish; subtitled)
... The tio duro, my step brother
president? For life!?
BAUDOLINO
It happened in other places. What's
wrong with that?
BABA
For now, my father wants him at a
meeting in Bogota, to convince
Colombia to join Boleru... but tio
duro doesn't like Colombian gangs
in Boleru 'cause it'll screw up his
business. So, he'll play dumb to
jeopardize the talks.
BAUDOLINO
That's what we want if you... you
know....
INSIDE BABA'S BUBBLE - CONTINUOUS
Baba fumes.
ON DISPLAY: SPEECH TO TEXT, RECORDING and CONTACT, all black.
BABA
(Furious; in Spanish;
subtitled;)
I shall be number one. I am the
good son... Hanan Pacha!
BAUDOLINO (V.O.)
(through speakers)
Right, right. Get back to the 45
billion --
BABA
-- The tio duro is Uku Pacha --
BAUDOLINO
-- Back to the 45 billion!
BABA
(calming down)
Business men from China and Russia
as lessee of a concession for
mining. Petroboleru, the lessor.
Military brass from Brazil to
provide security guarantees,
pipelines and highways -- A
pristine, deep jungle by
Pillcopata... a birds' haven --
BAUDOLINO
-- that's good for my cockatoo!
BABA
(confused)
What about your cock?
BAUDOLINO
I said cockatoo... parrot!
-- Do you have the map?
BABA
On the flash. Los Amigos
Conservation, Blocks 119 and 132.
You should have a closer look --
BAUDOLINO
-- No time to bungle in the
jungle. I'm on an in-and-out trick.
RESTAURANT - LATER
Baudolino depressurizes the bubblehead and flips back the
holo-foil articulation. He checks his phone. Bluetooth's
earbuds blink.
He starts eating.
INSIDE BABA' BUBBLE - CONTINUOUS
Baba watches Baudolino eating.
BABA
Are we done?
RESTAURANT
BAUDOLINO
No, no... just eating. I'm
listening, keep going.
He swallows. Kills time scrolling table's TV channels. Stops
to watch.
ON TV CHANNELS
The EARTH ROTATES. COUNTRIES' COLORS FLASH. Anchor comments.
YELLOW AND RED DRONES shoot laser beams. Crash.
INFANTRY ROBOTS fight. Carcasses explode.
LASERS blast data centers. Servers spark.
ELECTRONICS SMOKE.
Anchor comments --
-- THUD. Baudolino turns his head to the -- nano-glass
window.
The backs of TWO SOLDIERS's slam into it. The nano-glass
wraps around their backpacked gear.
The riot escalates. RIOTERS wave flags and banners. "ES
NUESTRO ORO", "SENDERO JUVENTUD."
Patrons unfazed by the outside commotion.
ON MEDIA WALL: Broadcast of rioters escalating the Palacio de
Gobierno fence. Police water cannons drench them.
BABA (V.O.)
Watch TV Channel 52!
Baudolino searches on the table's display.
ON TV CHANNEL 52
A gang of teenagers surrounded by police.
Tickers scroll: "SENDERO JUVENTUD ARRESTADO EN EL CALLAO".
The face of a JAPANESE TEENAGER in a group of NATIVE KIDS.
BABA (V.O.)
That's the tight ass... lame chief
of the gang.
A HIGH-RANKING OFFICER separates the Japanese Teenager from
the others.
Walks him around the corner.
A stretched limousine pulls over. The high-ranking officer
opens the door. Bends respectful.
Japanese Teenager...
A gloved policeman's hand obstructs the camera.
The image wobbles. Goes dark.
The TV anchor comments.
BAUDOLINO
The names of the kids?
BABA (V.O.)
On the flash.
Baudolino nods. Resumes eating.
A YOUNG MAN (15) bursts into and runs toward the back of the
restaurant.
A SOLDIER, head to toe in ANTI-RIOT GEAR, rushes into the
restaurant.
SHOTGUN at a ready. He scans the patrons. The Patrons remove
VR headsets and bubbleheads.
OFFICER (50s), fat, walks in.
He checks the patrons' IDs.
Soldier points the shotgun at Baba's bubblehead, which turns
transparent.
Officer looks at Baba's face. Straightens up. Gives him an
official salute.
Baudolino gets two cards from -- the cream colored wallet.
Wi-Fi one on the table.
He bags the bubblehead collar. Phone in hand and earbuds
blinking, he walks toward the exit.
INSIDE BABA'S BUBBLEHEAD - CONTINUOUS
He watches Baudolino going by.
BABA
Right! It's getting busy here.
Let's party... Ayauhuasca in
Barranco.
BAUDOLINO (V.O)
Tired! Another long flight back
tomorrow.
RESTAURANT
The Soldier stops Baudolino with the barrel of the shotgun.
Baudolino shows him the ID card. Nods toward Officer.
Officer scans the ID card and scrutinizes Baudolino.
Baudolino talks with Baba, for Officer to hear.
BAUDOLINO
(in Quechua; subtitled)
Ayahuasca in Barranco? No time for
that. I'm busy selling your stuff.
(smiling at Officer; in
Quechua; subtitled)
Not a good time to party!
The Officer gives Baudolino a blank stare. Returns the ID.
Baudolino grabs Baba's -- two vertical stripes jacket -- from
the rack. Gets out.
INT. HOTEL ROOM - BATHROOM - NIGHT
Baudolino watches his tired face in the DIGITAL MIRROR -- a
display with multiple MODES. In the mirror, behind him, the
reflection of the bedroom's WINDOW toward a sunny jungle
landscape. Sailor's covered cage in front of it.
On the sink counter, the open suitcase. Inside, the slotted
bubblehead collar and an ELECTRONIC SCANER. Aside, a LAPTOP
and the phone.
He uploads Baba's interview records from the phone to the
laptop.
Then the files from the FLASH DRIVE. Red light blinks.
He walks into the bedroom...
BEDROOM - CONTINUOUS
...toward the sunny jungle view on the DIGITAL WINDOW -- a
DISPLAY with multiple MODES.
ON DISPLAY - WINDOW MODE: A river meandering through the
forest. Colorful parrots whistle flying between the trees'
branches.
Sailor pleads with whistles. Baudolino removes the cloth.
Sailor takes mini-steps on the perch toward the TV display.
Flaps his wings along with the parrots. Steps back toward
Baudolino. Cocks his head up. Blinks sadly.
Baudolino mimics the bird. Cocks his head. Blinks slowly.
BATHROOM
BAUDOLINO
(to the mirror)
Switch to device-mode.
The mirror changes.
ON DISPLAY - DEVICE MODE: DEVICES & NETWORKS ICONS.
He disables them. Saves the laptop.
He sweeps the display and the walls with the electronic
scanner.
He casts the laptop's screen onto the display.
ON DISPLAY - DEVICE MODE:
BABA'S INTERVIEW RECORDS - VIDEO, AUDIO, BIOMETRICS.
SPEECH TO TEXT texts.
FLASH DRIVE FOLDER icon.
ANALYSIS and RECOMMENDATION boxes blink.
BAUDOLINO
(to laptop)
Analysis.
ON DISPLAY - DEVICE MODE: Records scroll fast. Live results
tally.
BIOMETRICS:
40% RATIONAL/30% EMOTION POSITIVE/30% EMOTION NEGATIVE
SPEECH ANALYSIS:
7 GOVERNMENT CLEPTOMANCY
5 ARMS SCANDAL
4 GOLD / 4 COPPER / 4 OIL
4 ZAHVAT MASLO VLASTI
3 YOUCHI GANGING DE MEITAN
3 KAMPAN EKIKA
3 UNCONSTITUTIONAL/3 VOTING RIGHTS
OUT OF CONTEXT:
9 FUCK-UPS/8 TIO DURO/7 CULO HUECO
He reviews the results.
Opens the flash drive folder.
ON DISPLAY - DEVICE MODE - FILES:
YUTO BONDIEU and other NATIVE NAMES.
LOS AMIGOS CONCESION - MAPS BLOCKS 132,119.
He hovers the pointer over the maps.
Continues checking the photos.
MINING EXPLORATIONS.
DEPLETED FOREST.
BLACKENED GROUND.
BAUDOLINO
Recommendation.
He purses his lips. Types in and whispers.
BAUDOLINO (V.O.)
Potential recruit motivated by...
hate against his stepbrother....
Wants to be the next President.
Recommend -–
Upbeat music distracts him. He turns and walks toward the --
BEDROOM
Sailor dances on his perch in the rhythm of the "Jungle
Samba."
ON DISPLAY - WINDOW MODE: Jungle views. Parrots flying.
BAUDOLINO
Internet mode.
ON DISPLAY - INTERNET MODE: The jungle view shifts to the
BOLERU REPUBLIC website: ¡ESTAS EN GOB. BOPE! TRAMITES Y
SERVICIOS. ORGANIZACION DEL ESTADO. TRANSFORMACION DIGITAL EN
EL BOLERU. ESTADIST ICAS. -- Nowadays, Bolivia and Peru are
united.
BAUDOLINO
Search for Lima, Barranco, Club
Ayauhuasca.
ON DISPLAY - INTERNET MODE
The nightclub's website. Loud rock-and-roll. Live camera on
dancing crowds. Strobe, and laser lights.
SAILOR
Gente del mundo, relax!
Sailor squawks. Sidesteps away from the display.
BAUDOLINO
Search for Madre De Dios, Los
Amigos Concession, Pillcopata.
ON DISPLAY - INTERNET MODE: BOLERU map. Zoom into the Madre
De Dios river. Mazuko and Pilcopata dots.
Sailor sidesteps closer to the display.
BAUDOLINO
Pillcopata.
ON DISPLAY - INTERNET MODE: Pillcopata nature and HOTELS
pictures. Advertisements of HELICOPTER SHUTTLES and
HOVERCRAFTS.
Switch to VIDEOS of parrots flying.
SAILOR
Yaaas... Mooomaaghhr!
Baudolino opens the cage. Sailor flies out, pathetically.
Settles on Baudolino's shoulder. Nips on his ear.
Baudolino shifts his eyes to Sailor. Wonders.
BATHROOM
Sailor on his shoulder.
ON DISPLAY - DEVICE MODE: RECOMMENDATION text box: "Potential
recruit motivated by hate against his stepbrother. Baba wants
to be president. Recommend|" Prompt flashes.
BAUDOLINO
(to display)
Mirror mode.
ON DISPLAY - MIRROR MODE: Devices disappear. Baudolino's
tired face. In doubts.
Sailor flaps his wings. Leans his head against Baudolino's
ear.
Baudolino's doubts fade away. So be it.
He resumes typing.
BAUDOLINO (V.O.)
(whispering)
-- hiring the prospect. Request
approval to... extend mission to
the oil field Blocks in Los Amigos
Concession.
ON LAPTOP: A series of screens. CIA LOGIN PROCEDURE.
BIOMETRICS. ENCRYPTION. UPLOAD in progress.
Baudolino yawns. Closes his eyes, waiting. Sailor closes his
eyes.
EXT. MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - DAY
The mighty river branches out then converges. Islands and
banks of emerald jungle canopy.
A hovercraft glides inches above the water. Fans WHOOOOSH.
Overhead, a GPS gimbal drone follows its course.
INT. HOVERCRAFT - MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - CONTINUOUS
Rock and roll music. Through the transparent HUD windshield,
the fast parade of brown river branches, banks and their
luxuriant vegetation.
At the lower HUD: MAZUKO-CENTRO PUNKIRI GPS MAP, WEATHER,
HOVERCRAFT FUNCTIONS, DRONE FUNCTIONS & CAM, A/V RECORD apps.
On the dashboard, the open laptop mirrors the HUD apps.
Baudolino pilots. Between the seats, TWO JOYSTICKS and a
TRAKPAD. On the back seat, the suitcase and Sailor's covered
cage.
Through the HUD windshield, orange, white and brown raw scars
of deforestation. Calcified river bed and banks. Pools of
yellowish water.
He remotes the drone over with the joystick.
BAUDOLINO
Zoom in. Record.
ON HUD-DRONE FUNCTIONS & CAM
RECORD dot blinks. CLOCK starts. ALTITUDE, SPEED, AIR QUALITY
data come alive.
Dredging rafts. Flex hoses. Cascading strainers. Planks.
Shacks.
GARIMPEIROS run along narrow planks firing at the drone. The
video feed jitters.
AIR QUALITY RED ALERT: MERCURY 25% - DANGER
BAUDOLINO
(singing)
Train of gold, train of gold,
Took me long to find what's wrong,
Train of gold, train of gold...
EXT. MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - LATER
The hovercraft glides over the narrower, smooth flowing,
river, and pristine forest banks.
A large clearance cut through the forest. In the distance, an
oilfield. YELLOW RIGS surrounded by METHANE COLLECTION DOMES.
The hovercraft stops. The drone flies toward the oilfield.
INT. HOVERCRAFT - MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - CONTINUOUS
ON HUD-DRONE FUNCTIONS & CAM
Three EGG-SHAPED YELLOW DRONES approach from the oilfield.
At close range, dogfight maneuvers. Chinese letters and logo.
SPEED "00"
RED ALERT: COERCIVE RPO.
INT. HOVERCRAFT - MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - LATER
Techno music beat. Baudolino sucks from a ready-to-eat bag.
He looks over. Hand on joystick, he slows down the
hovercraft.
Pipes rise from the river, extending in the distance through
a cut in the jungle's forest wall.
He sends the drone over.
ON HUD-DRONE FUNCTIONS & CAM
RECORD dot blinks. CLOCK runs.
Pipes stream backward. Ahead, they converge toward a
sprawling mining complex.
Four red dots swell into FOUR DRONES. Hover in formation,
blocking the path.
SPEED "00"
Russian company logo. ZAHVAT MASLO VLASTI. The cam feed jams.
Techno beat fuzzes.
Baudolino gives the finger to the drones.
EXT. MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - DAY
At sunset, the hovercraft and the drone follow the course of
the meandering river. The walls of the dense jungle stream
along the banks.
INT. HOVERCRAFT - DAY
Baudolino watches the GPS map route on the HUD. Pillcopata
and Paraiso Hotel dots.
He zooms in from the digital pad.
A small village next to industrial structures.
EXT. PILCOPATA - DAY
The drone flies over a deserted village. A few construction
site cabins. Japanese lettering on the roofs.
Farther away, wood sawmill installations. Conveyers from them
to the river bank. Piles of logs, rusty bulldozers and
metallic structures.
A couple of naked TRIBESMEN and a few PEOPLE in unkept
military attire watch the drone flying by.
EXT. MADRE DE DIOS RIVER - PILLCOPATA - DAY
The hovercraft turns from water to marshland.
Glides on a narrow forest trail.
Stops by the strange hotel structure. Vine-like trusses
swallowed by jungle lianas and moss. -- Once upon a time, the
hotel was a blend-with-nature architectural marvel.
Baudolino gets out from the hovercraft. Wonders about the
worn out, crooked sign Roth Pillcopata Paraiso Hotel.
INT. PARAISO HOTEL - DAY
Baudolino walks on a wavering, cracked concrete path.
Above, the roof's woven liana canopy. Collapsed areas.
Jungle's liana hang trough holes.
At the bar, PECKER, a burly man (50) with rimmed glasses,
scientist-looking, kills time drinking.
Above the bar, the TV.
ON TV: Red and yellow drones fighting. Some crash and fall.
The channel's scrolls titles FOREIGH INTERESTS TRIGGER
COMPETITION CONFLICT...
Pecker scrutinizes Baudolino and the covered parrot's cage.
He nods a greeting. Baudolino nods in turn.
The hotel HOST (30s), a native man, greets Baudolino.
Suddenly. Baudolino's suitcase drops.
Head jerks back. A swat. Karate-like chop.
On the floor, a giant bug upside down. Legs twitching. Turns
on them and crawls away.
HOST
A Megaloblatta Longipennis, Sir,
small Beetle.
BAUDOLINO
Longipennis? How big of a big
Beetle?
Host smiles, extends a tablet. Baudolino pays with the credit
card. Gets a key card.
INT. HOTEL LOUNGE - MORNING
Sailor's cage swings.
Baudolino carries it along the tortuous corridor. Sunrays and
liana's shadows alternate across his face.
Pecker chugs a beer at the bar. Next to him, TWO TEENAGED
BOYS, armed, laugh and drink. Pecker greets Baudolino by
raising the jug.
Baudolino nods at him and sits at a table.
Pecker joins him. He places his leather case on an empty
chair.
On the leather case, the embossed British coat of arms and
Royal Anthropological Society.
BAUDOLINO
Juicing yourself up early?
PECKER
I'm Pecker Smithe, British
ethnographer.
BAUDOLINO
I saw the blazon. I'm Paco Garrido,
auto parts sales.
PECKER
(looking at the cage)
Auto parts?
BAUDOLINO
(uncovering the cage)
Family parts. My aunt parting with
the bird.
Pecker has a malaise at the sight of the bird. Ugh!
BAUDOLINO
She wants him to enjoy the company
of young --
-- A waitress METISSE GIRL (teens), frisky energy, fluffy
with braids hairstyle, stops by the table, hand on hip.
BAUDOLINO
-- Perico!
METISSE GIRL
Bombita! Name's Bombita. I'm not
your perico! Wha'you want?
BAUDOLINO
Are you on the menu?
METISSE GIRL
(rolling her eyes,
shifting them to the
boys)
Check with the Luminoso boys.
Baudolino turns to the bar. One of the boys smiles, thumb up.
Baudolino acknowledges, friendly. Turns his attention back to
the menu and -- Bombita.
BAUDOLINO
For now, Bunuelos and Api.
Pecker signals for another beer.
BAUDOLINO
Ethnographer... do you really,
really get into the indigenous
people's minds? I've met one, once
--
PECKER
-- No need to tell me. We do get
into their minds by learning their
language, listening to their
stories, experience their habits.
BAUDOLINO
Habits....About peeling the yams
clock or counter-clockwise?
That level of their mind? -- Let me
tell you the story of this
ethnographer. He was studying a
shaman in the Solomon Islands. The
shaman gave him a farewell gift, a
powder to make him... and whatever
he touches, invisible. The
ethnographer was only to sniff it,
thus able to bust any jewelry or
clothing store, for nobody will see
anything.
PECKER
Did it work?
BAUDOLINO
No!... He didn't sniff it! And
that's my point about the...
ethnographer experience.
EXT. HOTEL GROUNDS - LATER
From the hotel deck, cage in hand, Baudolino squints at the
sun and scrutinizes the surroundings.
A jungle clearing close to the hotel and two intersecting
trails through the tall grass.
He walks on the one toward the jungle.
Next to him, Pecker picks a cigar from an engraved silver
case. Lights, and puffs it, content.
On the other trail, TRIBESMEN in a single file carry loads of
bananas, fish, plantain wraps, and skin bags.
LANCE DE FER (60s), a big labyrinth tattoo on his back, woven
headband, feather piece on chest, and spear in his hand,
leads the group.
Baudolino lets the tribesmen to pass.
TRIBESMAN ONE, the last the file, looks surprised at -- the
pyramidal cage.
He rushes to the head of the file.
Ample gestures and excited talk between Tribesman One and
Lance De Fer. The first points back, the second rises his
hand to stop the file.
Lance de Fer scrutinizes Baudolino and the pyramidal cage.
The tribesmen step closer to look. A collective HRMPH!
Amused, Baudolino removes the cage cloth.
OHH!AHH. Startled, the tribesmen step back and pack against
each other.
Lance de Fer kneels and cups the cage with his hands,
ceremoniously.
He stands up and, agitatedly, mimics a pyramidal shape.
Points at the jungle.
LANCE DE FER
(unknown language; to
Baudolino)
.......
He rolls his eyes. Falls into a trance. The tribesmen step
forward and close their eyes. Mumbling prayers.
LANCE DE FER
(intoning)
.......
He comes out of it, face gradually turning to bliss.
He bursts into a hearty laughter. The tribesmen's follow
suit. A crazed, silly laughter.
Sailor fluffs his wings, scared.
SAILOR
Gente del mundo, relax!
Tribesmen laughing stops. Frightful faces.
They step away from the cage.
Confused, Baudolino looks at Pecker.
PECKER
(to Baudolino)
The tribe is from Paratoari
Pyramids. Pyramid Head, their
chief, teaches them that laughter
is... heavenly good.
(unknown language; to
Lance de Fer)
......
He points at Baudolino, the cage, and jungle.
LANCE DE FER
(to Pecker)
........
He gestures wings flapping, then points at the jungle.
PECKER
(to Baudolino)
He says that he knows a good place
for your parrot --
-- Lance de Fer pulls on Pecker's sleeve.
LANCE DE FER
(to Pecker)
.......
He touches his head, forms a pyramid shape with his hands.
Simulates a respectful bow.
PECKER
(to Baudolino)
They want to show the cage and the
parrot to their chief, first. Then
they'll release the parrot.
Baudolino rejoices.
BAUDOLINO
(to Lance de Fer)
Perfecto!
He's about to hand over the cage. Pecker grabs his hand.
PECKER
(to Lance de Fer)
..........
Lance de Fer blinks. Nods hesitantly.
PECKER
(to Baudolino; exited)
I told him that we want to see
their chief, the Pyramid Head.
BAUDOLINO
Nope! Must go back by noon.
Pecker rushes toward the hotel,
dismissing Baudolino's refusal.
PECKER
You're missing a great opportunity.
I can't! Must grab my gear. You
decide in the meantime.
Lance de Fer, smiles at Baudolino. Teeth missing.
Baudolino fakes a short, crazed laughter.
EXT. JUNGLE - DAY
The tribesmen briskly walk on the narrow jungle trail.
A wave of flashing color above. A cacophony of shrieks.
RAAAK! REEEK! The flying flock of parrots come to rest on the
trees' branches.
Baudolino takes pics with his phone.
Loaded with VIDEO, AUDIO EQUIPMENT, and an EXPLORER BAG,
Pecker joins him sweating, breathing hard.
PECKER
Perception of value. For them, the
pyramidal shape is sort of...
divination... the place where they
live, their tribe... the chief, the
--
BAUDOLINO
-- Scientific gobbledygook turns
off my curiosity... What's this got
to do with Pyramid Head?
PECKER
(excited)
Shamanic character -- Two years
ago, I had a short meeting with --
you'll see for yourself -- too
short... to fully experience.
Now... Marvelous opportunity!
EXT. MANOOSI NATIONAL PARK - NIGHT
The group stops in a jungle clearing. On a knoll, a TREE
HOUSE platform. Hammocks under a roof on branchs.
Lance de Fer talks with Pecker.
LANCE DE FER
(unknown language)
..........
He gestures a pyramid head and a respectful bow. Points at
the moon and its trajectory. Up to the midnight's peak.
PECKER
(to Baudolino)
He wants 'll have to ask Pyramid
Head about us. He'll be back to get
us at high-moon.
The tribesmen disappear into the jungle.
- LATER
Baudolino and Pecker in hammocks. The first watches the
bright moon through the tangled branches of the roof. Pecker
sleeps.
Lance de Fer head sticks above the platform. Shushes
Baudolino. Nods toward Pecker.
EXT. PARATOARI JUNGLE - TRAIL - NIGHT
The moving clouds cover the moon. The wind swishes through
the jungle trees. The birds gurgle, hoot, and cackle.
In almost complete darkness, Baudolino walks with Sailor's
cage, uncovered. Sailor croaks. Lance de Fer leads the way.
BRIDGE - LATER
Bright moon. Lance de Fer emerges from a thicket.
In front of him, a rope bridge over a crevice.
They cross the wobbling bridge. Climb up an escarpment.
PYRAMIDS - CONTINUOUS
Lance de Fer walks down a trail.
Baudolino looks at the valley. Pyramid-shaped hills on the
side of the mountain and a distant camp at its foot.
TRIBE'S CAMP - LATER
TRIBESMEN and TRIBESWOMEN sit by the fire and sort out fish
and plantains. Around them, PYRAMID-SHAPED TENTS.
Lance de Fer leads the way to a COLORFULL TENT decorated with
Inca motives.
INT. PYRAMID HEAD TENT - NIGHT
Lance de Fer and Baudolino enter the tent. The beaded curtain
bells softly chime.
Dim light.
At the back, PYRAMID HEAD, cross-legged on a triangular mat.
Flat-topped head covered by a cloth. A horizontal WEAVED
OPENING at the eyes level. One vertical down to the chin.
Body wrapped in a cloth with Nazca lines motifs. On the mat,
small bowls and odd-looking smoking pipes.
At the chime, Pyramid Head raises the veiled head.
FROM BEHIND THE WEAVE
Indistinct visitors. Lance de Fer prompts Baudolino to move
forward and uncover the cage. Then leaves.
BACK TO SCENE
Sailor flaps his wings. Steps on the perch, closer to the
gate.
Pyramid Head bends over the parrot's cage.
Suddenly, loud drumming outside. Sailors gets agitated.
SAILOR
Gente del mundo, relax!
Pyramid Head bursts into laughter. Imitates Sailor's
flapping.
Sailor croaks and dances in the drums' beat.
PYRAMID HEAD
(to Baudolino; thin voice;
broken English)
Good, good, smart bird... yees,
live in pyramid... knows secret....
Baudolino crouches at the invitation.
PYRAMID HEAD
I have laugh secret.
BAUDOLINO
Laughing has no secrets with me --
But you have a more interesting
secret.
He points at Pyramid Head's veil.
PYRAMID HEAD
Um-hmm... curious! Curious about
secrets?
Baudolino gestures: But of course, let me have them.
Pyramid Head nods, slowly. Loads orange powder into a three
pronged pipe. A fine cloud rises.
PYRAMID HEAD
Ayahuasca! Sacred secrets... ask
sacrifice....
FROM BEHIND THE WEAVE
Baudolino shrugs. Go ahead.
IN FRONT OF THE WEAVE
Pyramid Head's eyes widen behind the weave. The spell swells
the veil.
PYRAMID HEAD
I see... you walk two feet above
the ground... thereafter.
Baudolino shrugs again. Fine.
Pyramid Head lifts the pipe to the vertical weave. Bends
forward.
FROM BEHIND THE WEAVE
Baudolino presses the brunched prong end to his nostrils.
PYRAMID HEAD (O.S.)
RAPÉ!
BACK TO SCENE
Baudolino snuffles. Sneezes in the powder bowls. The powders
explode. Orange, yellow and green dust envelops their heads.
Pyramid Head opens Sailor's cage.
Baudolino's head lulls. Eyes open wide. Eyes CROSS.
Pyramid Head's collapses forward. The drumming subsides.
BAUDOLINO'S HALLUCINATION
Pyramid Head stands up. Warped. Ample robe. Nazca animal
geoglyphs crawl across. Lifts the head veil.
Charismatic features. An inverted pyramidal head, large at
the top. Dark, wrinkled skin. Green, bright eyes, wide apart.
Small mouth, pointed chin.
A faint rock and roll beat.
Pyramid Head slowly extends the hands, laterally. The dress's
fabric strains. Woman's breasts poke through.
Sailor flies out of the cage. Plumage rejuvenates to bright
colors. Wings flap in slow motion above Pyramid Head's head.
PYRAMID HEAD'S TRANCE
Over the irregular tribal drums' beat, the pyramidal head
MORPHS to the round face of MAMA QUILLA, the Inca Goddess of
the Moon. A large CEREMONIAL HAT and EARINGS adorn her head.
She raises her hands to the parrot's slow-flapping wings.
Glorifying.
MAMA QUILLA
(echo)
I am Mama Quilla, the Goddess of
the Moon and Holder of Time...
turning back... to the beginning of
Time...
BAUDOLINO'S HALLUCINATION
Black dilated pupil eye.
A colorful round dot grows bigger.
Blink of eye.
The Earth fills the iris. Rotates in reverse.
Time runs backwards from "2065:10:1:02".
MAMA QUILLA (O.S.)
(warped)
... beginning of time...
PYRAMID HEAD'S TRANCE
People die by plague, Spaniards in armors conquer, Incan
warriors fight with spears and shields...
MAMA QUILLA
(echo)
... through the dark eras of
sickness... and destruction...
BAUDOLINO'S HALLUCINATION
The clock rewinds from "2045:01:03:20".
The Earth rotates clockwise. Colored countries flash.
Electronics spark and smoke.
The atomic bomb mushroom swells.
Clock: "1945:08:06:08".
Burned forests smolder.
Blackened ground.
Village wiped out by flash flood.
Explosions.
Tanks.
Infantry torn apart.
Clock: "1914:08:20:23"...
MAMA QUILLA (O.S.)
(warped)
... violence... and sickness...
PYRAMID HEAD'S TRANCE
The dark history devolves to bright times. PEOPLE cultivate
the fields, use YUPANA TABLES and QUIPU KNOTS to trade
GRAINS.
Corn kernels stream from bucket to mill. From mill to
amphora. Cactus buds and flower petals drop in. Frothing
mixture overflows. Fire burns under the amphora.
MAMA QUILLA
(echo)
... to the times of... abundance...
progress...
BAUDOLINO'S HALLUCINATION
Clock rewinds from "1914:08:20:23".
Ships sail to new territories.
Missionaries trade with native people.
Railroads extensions wrap the Earth.
Industrial Revolution.
Train with a steam engine.
Steampunk gears turn.
Clock: "1750:03:47:23"
MAMA QUILLA (O.S.)
(warped)
... abundance... progress...
PYRAMID HEAD'S TRANCE
Mama Quilla, her husband SUN GOD, and INCA DANCERS twirl.
Around them, INCA PEOPLE celebrate by drinking BEER and
chanting "Chicha! Chicha!"
The OLD MAN CREATOR OF THE WORLD, majestic, white beard,
blesses the dance from the heavens, heartily laughs. Toasts a
jug with beer. Beer spills.
MAMA QUILLA (V.O.)
(echo)
... when the Old Man Creator of the
World... was teaching the sacred
secret of harmony... for the
future... for Universal Harmony!
PAUSE OF PYRAMID HEAD'S TRANCE
Baudolino's vacant, cross-eyed stare.
He tries to refocus on the surroundings. Shakes his head.
Falls back into hallucinating.
BAUDOLINO'S HALLUCINATION
MAMA QUILLA (O.S.)
(warped)
... future... Universal Harmony...
Steampunk gears stop. Clock STOPS at: "1750:03:47:23"
Gears RESTART in the opposite sense. Clock JUMPS to
"2065:10:1:02." Runs forward.
The steampunk gears MORPH into Axons and Neurons.
Bioelectric signals run. Synapses connect.
Brain cells group. Form a brain. Brains multiply.
Brain waves interfere. Interferences turn to field forces.
Universe's field force. Brains at nodes. A galaxy of brains.
The sound of Old Man Creator of the World's laughter.
PYRAMID HEAD'S TRANCE
Mama Quilla rises her hands in adoration to the laughing Old
Man Creator of the World.
MAMA QUILLA
(echo)
... The secret key is...
Laughter... Laughter!
Old Man Creator of the World's laughs. Deafening.
JUNGLE CLEARING - MORNING
Baudolino dreams. A fit of giggling shakes the hammock.
Pecker wakes up. Looks over.
A plume of smoke rises from the firepit, down in the
clearing. Lance de Fer roasts yucca.
PECKER
What's to laugh about?
Baudolino blinks. Wakes up. Squints at the morning light.
Groans from the hangover.
Pecker wonders.
Baudolino tries to get up.
Awkward move. The hammock flips, and he falls backwards. His
head knocks on the platform. More pain.
Short memory kicks in. Eyes alert. He looks at -- his boots,
tangled up on the hammock.
BAUDOLINO
Bah!... help me --
Pecker helps him back into the hammock. Sits on his.
BAUDOLINO
Mighty surprise! Your Pyramid Head
--
PECKER
(intrigued)
-- Wait! You didn't....
He turns to yell at Lance de Fer.
PECKER
(to Lance de Fer; upset;
unknown language)
......
Lance de Fer deflects the culprit. Shakes his head and mimics
a pyramid.
LANCE DE FER
(unknown language))
......
PECKER
Darn! She didn't want to see me?
But she did your... cockatoo!?
Baudolino excuses himself. Not up to me!
PECKER
You'll have to tell me everything!
He gets his phone ready to record.
BAUDOLINO
My brain's foggy... right now...
this laughing secret....
PECKER
Yes?
BAUDOLINO
... came with an omen --
PECKER
(stands up; alert)
-- Oh, you too!?
BAUDOLINO
What do you mean?
PECKER
Well... two years ago... she told
me the ha-ha secret....
BAUDOLINO
And?
PECKER
I... I wasn't supposed to....
BAUDOLINO
Go on.
PECKER
Touch a man's penis or else... die.
BAUDOLINO
(laughing)
That's a whole show! Of a sha
woman. What else would a woman
curse you with? You're still alive,
aren't you?... Didn't you --
PECKER
-- What tells you that I would have
such an inclination?
BAUDOLINO
Well, you're an ethnologist!
Supposed to experience! Verify!
Pecker is hesitant.
BAUDOLINO
C'mon, get yourself in a scientific
experiment mode.
Baudolino unzips his fly.
Pecker is outraged. His index finger shakes. Bends over
Baudolino's body.
Straightens up. Frightful. Waits.
Baudolino gives him a confident shrug. See? No problem!
Pecker smiles, relieved.
The smile freezes. His eyes go wide. He drops backward, flat.
Head bounces off on the platform. THUD.
BLACK.
EXT. SEATTLE - FISH MARKET - DAY
Rain pours on driverless DELIVERY CARTS.
On Seattle's Fish Market crowded street, PEOPLE walk with or
without umbrellas. Shopping bags.
In the background, the Space Needle tower.
Baudolino sits in a high-tech wheelchair by the entrance of
the market. Impervious to the rain No umbrella.
Rain beads drip from his beard and long hair strands.
A rain stream flows along the curb and by his feet's shoes
resting on the footrest.
An attractive YOUNG WOMAN (25) walks by.
He watches her entering the market.
In the market, PEOPLE buy fish packages from vending machines
bordering the walls.
Other PEOPLE choose fish from a conveyor. The fish flip,
flop, and fall off.
A group of THREE JOLLY TEENAGER GIRLS walks down from the
Design Art School.
They join Baudolino, set umbrellas aside and pull out
sketchbooks from their backpacks.
A show-off of paper origami and sail boats' drawings.
GIRL ONE (18), nice figure, rests her hand on his shoulder.
Two of the girls launch their origamis on the curb's rain
flow.
One gets stuck in the grille of a storm rain. Yells of
disappointment. The other keeps floating. Victory yells.
Baudolino launches his own. A small sculpted wooden boat.
Against the odds, it flows down a long way. Hurrays from the
girls.
Girl One applauds.
Down at the crossroad, PEOPLE rally with banners.
INT. BAUDOLINO ROOM - DAY
From the wheelchair, Baudolino watches the receding rain. The
clouds make way to the bright afternoon sun.
The sunrays bathe the room in an orange light. Girl One
snoozes on the bed.
A cell phone buzzes. Baudolino takes the call.
ON PHONE: BOBBY (30), crew-cut hair.
BAUDOLINO (O.S.)
(muffled)
Bobby!
He listens. His face alternates between embarrassment and
pleasure.
Girl One gets off the bed. Dresses up. Walks to Baudolino.
BAUDOLINO
(on the phone)
No, not here....
(baffled)
Oh, that's where you are?....OK,
I'll be over.
She wonders. What's up? He shrugs. It's OK.
She sits on the wheelchair's armrest. Arm on his shoulder.
Takes time to look at the sun. The sun shines in her eyes.
She gives him a tender kiss on the cheek.
INT. AUNTIE'S HOUSE - VESTIBULE - DAY
The door opens. Baudolino rolls his wheelchair in.
AUNTIE (35) leads the way. Tight leggings on bouncy buttocks.
Scanty top to show off her silhouette. Small metal plates
stuck on shaved head.
AUNTIE
Still recovering from Sailor's
mission?
LIVINGROOM
Bobby, athletic build, raises his hands to greet Baudolino.
Bends over to hug him.
BAUDOLINO
(to Bobby)
Bouncy, isn't she!?
AUNTIE
(pleased)
Bouncy? Hm... that's better than
Aunty-Bounty!
Bobby scrutinizes the wheelchair's gizmos.
BOBBY
Fine piece of engineering. How fast
in six seconds?
Baudolino looks at him reproachfully.
Bobby admonishes him. C'mon man!
BOBBY
(to Auntie and Baudolino)
Baudolino, we need to know what
happened!
AUNTIE
(indignant)
And cross-eyed! On top of --
-- Baudolino stops her with a head shake.
She briskly leaves. Another silhouette show-off.
Bobby likes that.
She bangs the door shut.
FITNESS AND COMPUTER ROOM
Large room full with fitness equipment. Electronic devices on
racks. On a wall, a painting of Sailor surrounded by parrots
in the jungle's trees.
Auntie sits fuming in front of TWO MONITORS.
ON MONITOR #1: BLISS KLEANIK website logo. PATIENT AGE "35."
A head schematic with sensors. Graphs monitor her cerebral
activity. Alarm flashes red: "Anxiety Control"
CONTROL
(soothing; filtered)
You are anxious dear. Take a deep
breath. Breathe Innn... Breathe
ooout...
Auntie behaves. Calms down. Gets the headphones on and looks
at MONITOR #2.
ON MONITOR #2: "HOMSEC" website logo. An array of views from
the house's rooms and outdoors.
She zooms in the living room.
ON MONITOR #2: Bobby and Baudolino talk. Baudolino looks
strait at the surveillance camera. Points index and middle
finger toward his eyes. They get the beer bucket out on the
veranda.
Auntie slams the headphones on the desk.
VERANDA
BAUDOLINO
... to the extent verified by the
ethnologist. For now, I am to live
two inches above the ground
or --
BOBBY
-- Wait, don't say it. You may
start believing that it's true!
What if you're on a higher floor?
Is that still ground?
Deep silence. Baudolino gestures. Don't wanna try!
He rocks his wheelchair. Ashamed.
BAUDOLINO
I know it's laughable --
BOBBY
-- Listen Bodo! Your mind is fucked
up good. Let's go back to her --
Baudolino shakes his head --
BOBBY
-- else... get back into the game.
Another negation from Baudolino. He gets antsy.
BAUDOLINO
Been just laid-off! -- I'd rather
hide than work...
BOBBY
(dismissive)
Officially!....Unofficially though,
I might have just the right thing
for you....It'll clear your mind...
Baudolino drops his head, dominated by a psychic slump.
BOBBY
Your muscles still good?
Baudolino gets out of his lethargy. Locks the wheelchair's
brakes.
Hands on the hand rests, he does a parallette routine.
A static knee raise. Then a V-Sit and pike.
Finishes with a handstand push-up. And holds it.
Bobby bends. Twists his head to get level with -- Baudolino's
eyes.
BOBBY
Let's talk about... Somalia.
Baudolino gets back to sitting on the wheelchair.
Laughs incredulous.
BOBBY
Good place to hide, if that's what
you need. I'm stationed in
Djibouti. Italian base... training
Italians. I'll be your controller.
BAUDOLINO
Controlling me about --
-- looks at the veranda's glass door.
Auntie behind it.
Bobby turns following Baudolino's glance.
Bobby waves at her, friendly. Apologizing. That's the way it
goes.
She makes a face and turns to leave.
But she turns back. Stick her tongue at them.
BOBBY
Cute girl! -- So, Italian, French,
and British fell off the favors
while India, Japan and Saudi Arabia
emerged as the cash cows. All, of
course, digging for rare metals.
BAUDOLINO
Hot-pot Djibouti! All in. French,
Russians, Chinese. Who do you want
me to spy on?
BOBBY
Wait! The Somalian Supreme King
mulls them all, but he likes Saudi
Arabia, you know, monarch to
monarch back scratch.
BAUDOLINO
Beating around the bushes?
BOBBY
Presently, Aga and Huda Bedouin
families fight guerrilla wars
against India's and Saudi Arabia's
mining companies.
Baudolino gets annoyed.
BOBBY
Our interests are with the Huda. We
want India out, make room for
Japan.
BAUDOLINO
(exasperated)
I like Geishas! Make me curious!
BOBBY
... You must deliver high-tech, low-
frequency sonic defense systems to
the Huda, a powerful Bedouin
family.
BAUDOLINO
(incredulous) )
In the wheelchair!
BOBBY
That's your cover! You're promoting
electric camel milking equipment. A
non-profit U.F.O.
BAUDOLINO
(miffed)
U.F.O.!
BOBBY
Unlimited Friendship Organization.
You know, camel milk butter,
powder, soap, lip balm. -- No
dangers. Short, easy in-and- out
mission.
EXT. SOMALIAN NORTHERN DESERT - NIGHT
A vortex of sand. A massive black bag gets set on a dune. A
coupling clicks open.
The stealth DRONE flies away.
The bag's zipper opens. Baudolino, white linen suit, rolls
out in a CRAWLER TRACK WHEELCHAIR. Big DUFFEL BAGS and
FOLDERS strapped on the sides and back of it.
He drives toward a mobile camp: FOUR AUTONOMOUS MOBILE DESERT
HOMES, A LIVESTOCK TRAILER and TRUCK, TWO THREE-WHEELER
MOTORBIKES, and scattered gear.
EXT. BEDOUIN CAMP - NIGHT
Ayyala dance music.
KHAN HUDA (50s), the family leader, reclines on a an ornate
Moroccan beanbag. YUNGUN (teen), TWO OLD (60s) and (70s), and
TWO KIDS sit crouched on the rug. On the rug: HOOKAH,
CELLPHONES, and GUNS.
Yungun lights an Agarwood stick, then hauls TWO GOATS to the
LIVESTOCK TRAILER. TWO CAMELS stick their heads through the
trailer's bars.
Behind them, an autonomous mobile home with popped-up
amenities expanded. On the roof, deployed solar petals.
Two BEARDED YOUNG MEN, fierce-looking, bullet belts across
the chest, smoke by the motorbikes and watch the dancing.
AYAH (30s), phosphorescent headgear with shiny beads, and a
GIRL (teen), dance jingling electronic tambourines. THREE
LITTLE GIRLS, dance along. An OLD MAN (70s) strums an
electric oud. Two OLD WOMEN clap to the beat.
Khan Huda stands up to greet Baudolino. Hand over heart.
KHAN HUDA
May peace be upon you. Your arrival
brings our hopes to fruition.
BAUDOLINO
And peace be upon you too.
The women stop dancing, look over.
Khan Huda signals them to keep dancing.
Khan Huda eyes the wheelchair, compassionately.
KHAN HUDA
What a misfortune! A curse from one
who envied you, perhaps?
BAUDOLINO
The curse of curiosity... after
all.
Khan Huda invites Baudolino to sit on the rug. Baudolino
politely declines. Gestures toward his wheelchair.
Staccato sound of automatic machine gun from afar. Baudolino
turns over.
Explosions and lights in the distance, beyond the sand dunes.
The men don't bother. The women keep dancing.
BAUDOLINO
Are we safe here?
KHAN HUDA
Don't worry about those. We're
concerned about the drones...
during the day.
Baudolino shifts his attention to the -- dancers.
Ayah catches on. Flicks her tambourine's LEDs. Amps up her
moves.
Khan Huda nods suggestively toward her.
KHAN HUDA
Enjoy. Stay longer.
BAUDOLINO
Your hospitality honors me. But my
people will pick me up tomorrow
night. Regretfully!
Khan Huda leads the way toward a mobile home.
KHAN HUDA
Hospitality is rooted in our
traditions. I regret your having to
leave so soon.
They cross -- tracks of tires in the sand.
The AUTONOMOUS MINERAL ORE RESEARCH - AMOR unit slowly rolls
by on an all-terrain chassis with desert tires. It stops. An
arm articulation with a PIKE extends. Lights blink.
Baudolino watches.
KHAN HUDA
The future has a strong speak on
our present lives.
HUMMM. The PIKE spins and stabs the sand. LED bar plots and
data come to life on control panels.
KHAN HUDA
(proud)
We have a good contract to map the
Lithium deposits close to the
surface --
(sad)
-- if only we can win the war with
our... brothers.
BAUDOLINO
You'll need gear for offence, not
just defense.
KHAN HUDA
Next time then....
INT. MOBILE HOME ROOM - NIGHT
Baudolino lies on the mattress under the bedsheet. His white
linen suit draped on wheelchair.
A swish. He turns his head.
The door slides open. Ayah, hand on hip, comes in and sits
cross-legged by the mattress.
Her gaze inquisitive -- his, curious.
She leans on the bean bag. Extends her legs.
Baudolino doesn't miss the show.
She flips the sheet with her foot. Tickles his foot's arch.
AYAH
Feel anything?
A bulge under the bedsheet.
AYAH
What can you do with your... legs?
BAUDOLINO
Everything. Except touch the
ground.
AYAH
Wow!....A curse? I can take care of
that.
Baudolino wonders. Amused.
AYAH
(marketing pitch)
My name means miracle... and
miracles is what I do, miracle
business.
She pulls from her deep cleavage a TOTEM -- an elongated body
with pyramidal head.
BAUDOLINO
Uggh! Pyramids!
AYAH
Ahh! A Nile situation!
BAUDOLINO
(distressed)
Amazon.
She's non-plussed.
AYAH
We must be close to the water then
-- Look, your jinnee must have been
touched by a devil, thus
malevolent. But mine, I've had it
since childhood. It's clean,
benevolent.
Baudolino plays along.
BAUDOLINO
So, I'm supposed to be curious
about your... jinnee. What's the
payment plan?
She moves over to lie next to him.
AYAH
... the wheelchair.
EXT. MOBILE CAMP - DAY
The ANTI-SONIC CAMOUFLAGE COVER stirs. Its surface matches
the sand's ripples. Next to it, a CYLINDER with a string and
straps.
BAUDOLINO (V.O.)
See how its appearance changed to
matches the sand? The organic
pigment in the material does that.
Thus, it's not discernible to the
remote drone operator.
Huda men nod, reverently.
On the sand, two extended duffle bags. In color-coded
pockets: cylinders, boxes, and accessories.
Baudolino gets a cylinder from the backrest holder.
BAUDOLINO
(demonstrating)
Keep the cylinder strapped to your
back. Make sure the reusable blast
capsule is reloaded. It'll blast
the cover out automatically....If
it doesn't, press this button.
Yungun emerges from under the cover. Reloads it into the
cylinder.
The AMOR unit rolls behind Baudolino's wheelchair. The arm
extends, the pike spears the sand. HUMMM. Lights blink.
BAUDOLINO
(points at the duffel bag)
In the boxes, covers for defense in
attack missions. What you --
-- A yell. Heads turn. The Old Man runs down from a dune.
OLD MAN
Habr Yunis! Yunis coming!
Baudolino looks wondering at -- Khan Huda who, cusses.
KHAN HUDA
(to Baudolino; deriding)
Men of poetry and... looove!
Bearded Men wrap up the duffel bags. Run with them toward the
mobile homes.
Old Man spread out the marketing folders.
A BEDOUIN FAMILY with THREE CAMELS approach.
HADI AGA (30s), the family head, rides on the first camel.
Hauled by a KID.
On the second, led by an ARMED AGA MAN (20), a shugduf draped
in cloth sways.
OLD AGA MAN (60s) hauls the third camel. A FAT OLD
WOMAN(40s), in full hijab and burqa, drowses on the camel.
They stop by Baudolino and Huda men.
The drapery of the shugduf gets pulled over by a YOUNG WOMAN.
A niqab on her face.
The families exchange polite greetings. Khan Huda introduces
Baudolino.
KHAN HUDA
(Arabic; subtitled)
We've been blessed to receive
business support from this
Frenchman. His products could
benefit from, say... even compete
on the International trade.
Baudolino greets the Aga family with a polite nod.
Khan Huda points at the marketing brochures.
ON BROCHURES: UNIVERSAL FRIENDSHIP ORGANIZATION - UFO.
Pictorials of electric milking equipment, camel milk butter,
powder, soap, chocolate, and lip balm.
HADI AGA
(Arabic; subtitled)
He doesn't look like a shepherd to
me....But let him bring the flock's
produce to fruition.
BAUDOLINO
(Arabic; subtitled)
It's also in the hands of the men
worshipping the holy Books of
Wisdom.
Hadi Aga and Khan Huda smile. Nod.
Then exchange furtive looks of distrust.
The Bedouin families bid farewell.
The Aga family gets going.
- LATER
Riding the camel, Hadi Aga turns to look back at -- the
Huda's mobile camp.
HADI AGA
(distastefully)
Mobile caravan!....They forgot the
traditional ways.
A short nod at Armed Aga.
Armed Aga gets on his phone. Talks. Turns toward the Huda
Camp. Nods at Hadi Aga.
MONTAGE - DRONE SONIC ATTACK
-- Hadi Aga tugs the camel to a fast gait. The others follow
riding toward a small sand dune.
-- In Huda camp, training continues. Baudolino holds a square
device in this hand.
BAUDOLINO
... to install the app on your
phone. That's how we know the sonic
gun's frequency and pow --
-- Aga Family on the top of a small dune. They look up. Three
DRONES fly over.
-- Armed Huda jolts at the sight of the approaching drones.
ARMED HUDA
(in Arabic; subtitled)
-- Ruuun!
END OF MONTAGE
Panic in the camp. Men wrap up the marketing brochures.
Three green drones hover overhead. A deafening pitch starts.
Men and Women run cupping ears with their hands toward the
mobile homes.
Mobile homes' extensions retract. Solar petals close.
Yungun cover pops from the cylinder. He wraps it on his body
while running. Stumbles.
Baudolino's cylinder pops. The cover deploys and covers him
and the wheelchair. A mound of sand.
Baudolino under the cover. Muffled sonic pitch.
High pitch. AMOR unit rolls erratically. Tips the wheelchair.
INT/EXT. UNDER THE SONIC COVER/DESERT- LATER
Silence. Baudolino sweats, pinned down sideways in the tipped
wheelchair.
He pulls over the cover. No sound. Blinding sun. The AMOR's
pike sticks up. Caught between two segments of the crawler
tracks.
He gets up from the seat. Cocks his ears. Snaps his fingers.
No sound. He's deaf. Looks around.
Empty camp. Bursts of wind swirl the sands. Tracks vanish
into desert.
He wrestles the chair upright with AMOR's drill as leverage.
He gets the SUITCASE from the wheelchair's side. Opens it.
Inside, a LAPTOP, HEADSET, GOOGLES.
He turns on the laptop.
ON LAPTOP: Repetitive "Network Interface Controller Failure".
The phone. Also dead. He repacks. Puts the googles on.
He rolls following the tracks. The pike beats the sand. One
thud per rev.
- LATER
Swirls of sand cover the tracks. They split. He rolls
Northbound.
On the top of a dune, he takes the googles off. Scans the
horizon. Only desert. He's dizzy, tired.
A burst of energy.
BAUDOLINO
(no sound; subtitled)
Alone, alone, I feel at home.
I hide from all, and feeling whole.
The energy drains.
At the edge of sight -- a vision. He turns.
A shimmering fortress? Tower?
He blinks. Shakes his head. Still there.
He rolls toward it.
EXT. FORTRESS EXTERIOR - DAY
He stops on the rough stone pavement in front of the
fortress's two-sided gate. Two wrought iron-barred doors at
the top.
He yells for attention. No sound.
The barred windows look back -- turn blind eyes.
He waits.
One of the doors opens. Behind the bars, the head of a nun.
Black headpiece.
MARIE (60s) briskly shoos him away. Slams the door shut.
Baudolino swears at length. Sweats.
EXT. FORTRESS EXTERIOR - NIGHT
Under the anti-sonic cover, he shivers. Falls asleep.
EXT. FORTRESS EXTERIOR - MORNING
He shouts at the gate. Waits.
Gate's doors -- blind eyes.
He pleads for mercy. Explains.
Both door opens. Marie's head on one. LUMPA's head, black
woman, nun's headpiece on, on the other.
Marie sternly argues. Shakes her head. The other woman argues
with her. Compassionately.
Marie shakes her head. Slams the door shut. Lumpa keeps
starring at -- Baudolino through the bars.
Baudolino berates.
- LATER
Baudolino dozes off, sweating under the hot sun.
A water skin bag and a small package drop next to the
wheelchair.
He drinks and eats.
Refreshed, he starts a new round of pleads.
The doors -- blind eyes.
EXT. SOMALIAN DESERT - NIGHT
Moon over the desert and fortress. Sound and lights of
explosions afar.
Inside the fortress's walls, a big building with solar
panels, a MOONLIGHT TOWER, a STONE TOWER and broken walls. On
the sides of the building, an ORCHARD and a COURTYARD.
Two drones buzz around the fortress. Hover above the -- mound
of pavement's stones.
MONTAGE BAUDOLINO DREAM
-- Baudolino sleeps under the sonic cover. Silence.
-- A gleaming steampunk drone-gramophone blasts rock-and-roll
music through its horns.
-- His fingers twitch. Strumming the cords of a guitar.Wakes
up. Relaxes. Drifts back into the dream land.
-- A big white room with large windows. The white draperies
wave. He sleeps in a white bed, wrapped in bright, white
sheets.
-- A shapely blond NURSE (20s) in white Red Cross uniform
sweeps his brow with a moist cloth. Water drops run down his
cheeks.
-- His crossed eyes open. A beatific smile. He extends his
hand toward the nurse's hand.
END OF MONTAGE
INT. CONVENT - RECEPTION BUILDING- BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - DAY
A sunburned hand extends.
A black, tattooed hand clasps around it.
BAUDOLINO (O.S.)
(somnambulant)
I love you!
LUMPA (O.S.)
(funny)
I love you too.
LUMPA (20s), British, punk afro hairstyle, pierced ears,
black habit, holds Baudolino's hand.
He lies in a narrow, wood-carved bedframe bed, covered with
white sheets. Still under the spell of dreams. Sunburned face
and lips daubed with white balm.
Marie squeezes a milk-soaked cloth in a basin. She hands it
over to Lumpa.
Still holding Baudolino's hand, Lumpa gently cools his brow
with the cloth. Water drops run down Baudolino's cheeks.
He wakes up. Blinks. Looks at the sunrays trickling through
the waving white draperies.
Then at Lumpa. He's confused. What... where... who?
Then scared -- at his feet.
Then relieved at -- the stretcher reclining in a corner.
A large room with white walls, a tall wood double door across
the bed. A solid wood desk in front of an ogive window.
On the walls, iconic representations of religious beliefs. A
Christian Trinity painting. New Age religious posters. An
INTERFAITH CALENDAR opened to "March 2067".
BAUDOLINO
(concerned; not hearing
himself)
...
LUMPA
(confident)
-- No worries. It's outside. I know
how these wheelchairs work.
Baudolino points at his ear. Shakes his head.
Lumpa gets it. She mimics driving the wheelchair. Points at
herself. Thumb up.
Lumpa nods at Marie, who walks to open the door.
Two nuns caught listening behind the door. FACUNDA (40),
Mexican, fat, dressed in blue habit, and FUJI (30), dressed
in Japanese Buddhist nun habit.
They rush in. Habits of different colors. Adorned with little
ethnic accents.
Other NUNS barge in, curious, giggling. They nudge against
each other to better see Baudolino.
PIPPI (40s), Italian, red curly hair and freckled face,
wearing a carpenter's belt over the habit.
ZUZU (30s), Swedish blonde tall, thick lips, somewhat
attractive,
BRIGHID (30s), Irish, petite, plantain-nosed, Celtic fashion
braided blond hair.
BOB (40s) German, frizzy red hair, foxy- eyed.
BADIA (30s), Ethiopian Muslim, dark skin, blue eyes, brown
habits.
Marie keeps a defying stance.
Baudolino in heavens. Nods at -- their soundless moving lips.
DOMINO (35), the prioress, French, bland-looking brunette,
complete white nun's habit and headpiece, makes her way
through the group.
She stops by Baudolino's bed. Scrutinizes him. Neutral. Tells
him something.
Baudolino touches his ears. Apologetic. But he remembers his
ordeal.
BAUDOLINO
(angry; not hearing
himself)
...
He points at the -- Trinity painting. Then at the Heavens.
Gradually, he loses steam. Hand drops on chest. Stops
talking.
Domino remains serene.
DOMINO
(French accent; to
sisters)
Let's give him peace.
She ushers the nuns out of the room. Closes the door.
Lumpa puts a glass of milk on the night table. Sits on the
bed. Rests a comforting hand on Baudolino's chest. Starts
singing.
LUMPA
(softly)
Baby born, Baby burned.
Baudolino looks at -- her hand resting on his chest. Calms
down.
Lumpa's hand inches from his chest to abdomen. Then lower.
Singing.
Baudolino's looks down. Suddenly up.
Domino in the doorframe.
DOMINO
(to Lumpa)
Especially you!
Lumpa swiftly retracts her hand. Stands up pointing at -- the
bell on the side table.
Mimics to Baudolino to ring it. Walks to the door.
Baudolino throws a defying smile at Domino, who -- responds
in kind.
DOMINO
Ignore our sisters'... confused
undercurrents.
She slams the door.
CORRIDOR
Lumpa walks ahead of Domino.
By the wheelchair, she attempts to get on it. Domino grabs
her elbow.
DOMINO
Not now, sister. Let's join the
others.
LUMPA
(protesting)
He wants it in his room!
Domino drags her away.
WORKROOM
Lumpa walks in.
A large room with arched windows overlooks the orchard. On
the opposite side, racks with HANDCRAFTS, MATERIALS, and
TOOLS.
The sisters chat and argue.
MARIE
... does not belong here!
We have to follow the vow of
chastity.
LUMPA
I don't see how you could possibly
break that.
Domino listens, standing in the doorframe.
Marie falls into prayer. Lips move. Fingers roll Christian
rosaries. By her seat, a vintage WHOOL SPINNING WHEEL and
small buckets of wool and yarn.
Zuzu pedals on a WORKOUT BIKE. A serene smile on her face.
ZUZU
I don't care about men. They don't
exist for me.
Lumpa stops by and watches the -- front of the bike seat.
She nudges Zuzu over.
LUMPA
I see how this could work. Let me
try it.
She gets on. Starts pedaling.
Domino walks along the sisters' tables. Stops at some.
Pipi chops a piece of wood. By her bench, HUMAN DOLLS WITH
ELONGATED LEGS.
Facunda weaves raffia into a small SANTOS DOLL. A bunch of
them and Christian crosses pile on her bench.
Brighid weaves BRIGID CROSES charms from straws.
Fugi makes origami religious crosses.
Badia lines up long Muslim prayer beads.
BADIA
The Muslim Sufi law asks us to open
our arms even to the apparent evil.
There should be beauty inside... we
only need to want it discovered.
Marie looks up from the spinning wheel.
MARIE
(flustered)
He'll have get in his machine and
out the gate....We are all here to
heal from the abuse of men... among
other reasons.
Next to her, Bob makes macrame patterns with an ELECTRONIC
DEVICE. She disagrees with Marie. Shakes her head.
DOMINO
(to all; walking)
Men may be bad, but let us not
forget that we gave them the apple.
Bob nods in agreement.
Lumpa bikes in a blissful mood.
LUMPA
Oh, yeeah! Yeaaah, yeaaah.
DOMINO
(to all)
Sisters! We withdrew from the
tormented world to reach the level
of tranquility... that allows us to
restore the peace within ourselves.
(to Marie)
There may be something good about
this man. We should give him...
temporary comfort.
(to all)
Let us not forget our sins. Let's
take responsibility, and repent! If
we reconcile within ourselves, we
could help others. That's how we'll
fulfill the larger scope of our
mission... to bring harmony to this
world.
MARIE
(upset)
Let's vote.
LUMPA
(in good spirits)
Let's bike, not vote! Voting will
divide us.
BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - DAY
Baudolino wakes up. White ointment over his sunburns.
UPTO here
He rings the bell. Muffled CLINGS.
He snaps his fingers. Muffled SNAPS.
Looks around. A sigh of relief at the wheelchair and the
marketing brochures.
Domino and Marie come in.
Domino carries a tray with food and a glass of milky-whitish
beverage. Without the headpiece. Hair tied up in a conch.
She's rather pretty than bland.
BAUDOLINO
Oh, it's you...
DOMINO
(stern)
Who did you expect?
Marie sets his cleaned white linen suit and a small pile of
artisanal clothes on the wheelchair.
BAUDOLINO
Can you sing?
Marie is intrigued. She rips the calendar's "April 2067"
page.
DOMINO
(to Baudolino; frowning)
....O, la, la, that one! Animal
instincts --
BAUDOLINO
-- Can't hear you well, please
louder.
Marie storms off the room. Bangs the door shut.
DOMINO
Animal instincts! I won't leave you
and Lumpa alone in the same room.
BAUDOLINO
Are you safer?
Domino sets the tray on the chair next to the bed.
Baudolino points at the -- the milky-whitish beverage. What's
that?
DOMINO
Choud d'oeuf.
BAUDOLINO
What's that?
DOMINO
French sort of... milkshake. Warm
milk, honey, and egg... good for
recovery -- Listen! The sisters
want you out... back to wherever
you came from.
BAUDOLINO
(mocking)
How cruel! Aren't you supposed to
help the unfortunate?
She looks at -- his legs.
DOMINO
....What happened?
BAUDOLINO
I don't want to talk about it. I
need time to think... hide for a
while. Can I hide here?
DOMINO
Hiding for self-preservation is an
animal instinct. A hermit withdraws
to enlighten his spiritually and --
-- She stops. Offended.
Baudolino's rolls his eyes.
She nods at the food tray. Leaves, muttering.
DOMINO
-- man behavior!
Slams the door shut.
BAUDOLINO
Nut hard to crack.
LOBBY - DAY
Baudolino rolls out into the lobby. Dressed in artisanal
shorts and cotton shirt. Face's sunburns mostly healed. Skin
peeling.
A stone-walled space. Two arcades ahead: one open to another
room, the other with decorative wrought iron.
He looks around. To the near-left, a freight elevator door.
Far-left, stacks of WHITE STENCILED BOXES.
He rolls over, curious.
White boxes stenciled with "Abbaye de Sisterhood Wines."
He picks up wine bottles: 2055 Grenache Abbaye de
Sisterhood," "2060 Muscat Blank Abbaye de Sisterhood."
Chuckles.
He exits through the door on the right.
EXT. GARDEN - CONTINUOUS
He passes by the CHAPEL on the right.
Chickens flap and scatter, scared.
Geese stretch their necks, alert.
Sheep graze, unperturbed.
Lumpa and Zuzu wave at him from the workroom's door, smiling.
Baudolino waves and smiles back.
The wheelchair bumps into a crumbled wall. His head jerks up.
On the left, the Moonlight Tower. A damaged metal and broken
glass structure at the top.
On the right, the stone tower. Rough base. Smooth, rounded
off top.
He rolls around the corner of the building.
EXT. ORCHARD - CONTINUOUS
In the doorframe of a room, toes flex and stretch.
Pippi comes out trying a pair of WOODEN CLOGS.
She waves Baudolino over.
INT. PIPI WOODSHOP - CONTINUOUS
Curling wood shavings litter the floor. Marionettes and
religious carvings cram the shelves.
Tools hang above stacked wood blocks and long poles. A pair
of HIGH STILTS leans against the back wall.
Pipi gets a marionette. Plays ventriloquist.
MARIONETTE
(in Italian; subtitled)
Do you want to learn Italian with
me?
BAUDOLINO
Buongiornissimo! Come butta?
Pipi laughs.
MARIONETTE
Molto bene! Ci si becca!
Baudolino gives them both a thumb-up.
EXT. ORCHARD - CONTINUOUS
He rolls by the elevator's grill. The elevator comes down.
The grill gate opens.
He stops.
Domino and Bob get out.
Marie remains in the elevator. Hands on a cart loaded with
white folded boxes. She watches over.
Domino shakes off hay straws from her dress. Sweeps her
perspired face. Removes her scarf.
DOMINO
(to Baudolino)
Voila! The hermit came out of the
hiding.
BAUDOLINO
I was looking for your sense of
humor.
DOMINO
It's tonic, isn't it?
She touches his forehead.
BAUDOLINO
And bubbly! Goes well with the good
vibrations beamed by some nuns.
DOMINO
(stern)
Sisters! Sisters of our sisterhood.
-- Fever's gone!
DOMINO
(to Marie)
Marie, when is the truck due?
MARIE
Friday. God willing.
She closes the grill. Elevator descends.
DOMINO
(to Baudolino)
There! It'll take you to Djibouti.
BAUDOLINO
Ah, Djibouti... an enjoyable ethnic
diversity to hide amongst.
Italians, Japanese, Russians,
Indians... not to mention the "O
La, La" people.
DOMINO
May God guide your walk in
silliness.
She regrets the slip of tongue. Looks at -- his feet.
Bob crosses herself.
Baudolino rolls away. Queasy.
EXT. GATE - CONTINUOUS
He halts at the gate.
A narrow, broken wooden bridge juts high below the two small
doors. A thick bar locks the gate across. To the side, a
stone stair climbs toward the bridge.
Two HIGH STILLTS lean on the stairs.
Eureka!
He grabs the stairs' edge. Hauls himself up. Hand over hand.
At the top, a jump-turn lands him on his butt. Next to the
stillts.
He straps them under his knees.
Lowers them. Slowly, hesitating. What if...?
The stilts touch the ground...
He gets up on them. Wobbles... steadies... balances. .. then,
rejoicing, strides down the alley.
The sisters look at him, hands to mouths. Astonished.
Frightful.
Fugi applauds gingerly. Pipi laughs happily. Zuzu nods,
impressed.
Marie walks away. Furious.
Domino freezes. Agape.
Lumpa walks along, directing him to -- the opening on the
higher level of the building.
She runs back to the wheelchair.
Baudolino leans against the edge of the opening. Falls
backwards on a haystack. Rests.
INT. HAY STORAGE/CRAFTS STORAGE - DAY
CRAFTS STORAGE - SAME TIME
Lumpa exits the elevator, on the wheelchair. Stops and
stretches, and pushes a button. "LOCK" red light.
A broad room lit by narrow side windows. Cracked plaster of
faded frescoes.
Shelves stacked with boxes. Racks of wool. Raffia grass.
Woven fabrics. Glass jars. Bottles.
She rolls by a broken spinning wheel.
HAY STORAGE - CONTINUOUS
She stops behind Baudolino. He turns his head.
She kneels. Slicks.
Head over head. Nose to nose. Her eyes and nostrils flaring
at the prey.
She crawls around. Sits on his quads. Takes her headpiece
off.
Unbuttons the blouse. Shows off the cleavage.
He gallantly surrenders.
BAUDOLINO
Got milkshake?
LUMPA
Yep! And mine's better than "O, La,
La's" choddo!
She stretches backward and unstraps his stilts.
The stilts fall.
Bounce to a rest on the alley.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - EVENING
Domino fumes. Liberated from monastic constraints. Flicks a
strand of hair. Raises her arms.
DOMINO
-- but what do I tell them? Walking
on stilts? Strapped in the
wheelchair!
(stuttering)
Fffu... flir...ting with
Lumpa!?
She's wild. Attractive. Paces the room.
Baudolino doesn't miss the show.
She clears her throat. Settles for a dignified expression.
DOMINO
It's a devilish mystery! What
happened with your...
She points at his legs.
DOMINO
... lower quarters!
He points at his head.
BAUDOLINO
Higher quarters curiosity.
Domino prompts him to continue.
BAUDOLINO
It's a secret. An omen! It comes at
a cost. You can't afford it --
Say... something like... you --
DOMINO
-- stop it! I can anticipate your
sinful... prevailing animal
instincts.
Humorously resigned, he points at the marketing brochures.
BAUDOLINO
I was cursed by a curandera. On a
business trip.
DOMINO
What business? Curandera in Africa?
Baudolino puffs. Caught off guard.
DOMINO
What did you do to her?
BAUDOLINO
(antsy)
-- Ohh, again... animal instincts!
I said I was curious.... This
Pyramid Head in the Amazon
jungle... actually a sha-woman --
DOMINO
(suppressing a laugh)
-- Pyramid Head!
She burst out in a hearty laugh...
DOMINO
That's it! Brain damage. I'll tell
my sisters there's nothing wrong
with your legs. Just a nutcase
case.
She walks away. Stops at the door.
DOMINO
(composed)
We have nutcase sisters here.
They'll vote to give you a break.
Maybe.
She leaves closing the door. Gently.
INT. HAY STORAGE - DAY
The wheelchair and the pile of hay at the edge of the
platform.
Outside, Baudolino, Lumpa and Pippi pick apples.
EXT. ORCHARD - CONTINUOUS
On high stilts. Put apples in shoulder totes.
Sunburns healed, Baudolino looks down. Domino walks by.
BAUDOLINO
Catch!
He throws an apple.
She looks up.
She catches it on the fly. Dexterously.
BAUDOLINO
Could it be that Adam gave the
apple to Eve?
Domino tosses the apple. Looks up. Freezes.
DOMINO
(yelling)
Ruuun!
TWO DRONES, green and black color patterns, hover above.
The sisters run for cover. Apples fall on the ground.
A high pitch starts. Lumpa and Pippi run to the hay's storage
opening. Plunge inside. The sonic cover pops from the
wheelchair.
PIPI
Vacca Puttana!
Baudolino aims the gun.
A laser dot on the first drone. Three pops. The pitch stops.
The drones wobble. Crash on the alley.
A GREEN DOME breaks away from the rubble. Rolls to rest
between apples.
Sisters stick out their heads from doors and windows.
Cautious. Cross themselves.
Domino walks out from the building. Looks at the crashed
drones. Then miffed at Baudolino's -- gun.
Baudolino stands by the edge of the opening. Looks inside.
Lumpa and Pipi feel with their hands the sonic cover. Wonder
at the hazy patterns of their bodies and the hay.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - DAY
Baudolino works, hunched over the desk overlooking the
courtyard.
Domino bursts into the room -- without knocking.
Takes her time to grasp what's on the desk: open suitcase,
gizmos inside, soldering kit, drone's dome, wires hanging out
from the laptop's circuit boards.
BAUDOLINO
Feel free to come in. Any time. No
need to knock on the door.
DOMINO
Wow! That's what I call a complex
business profile. Guns, hi-tech
electronics, U.F.O., travels from
the South American jungle to the
African deserts --
BAUDOLINO
-- It is what it is, and it isn't
what it is not.
DOMINO
Fine! I came to thank you for
your... performance. The sisters
are grateful. But they... I am also
concerned about the trouble ahead.
Baudolino lowers his head. Looks at Domino who -- raises an
eyebrow.
BAUDOLINO
The truck, then?
DOMINO
We're waiting for a message.
BAUDOLINO
(funny)
Pigeon message! Great! Then we have
time to trade secrets. And omens.
DOMINO
(leaving)
I'm not curious. Not expecting much
from --
BAUDOLINO
(mischievous)
-- Pecker? It's a good story. You
should.
Domino has another bout of furry. About to cry.
She rushes out. Bangs the door shut.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - NIGHT
Smoke plumes from the drone's dome. A pen melts solder.
Cot-covered fingertips pluck a chip.
Under a LED light, a PLASTIC FRESNEL LENS magnifies the tiny
"Made in USA" stamp.
Baudolino solders the chip into the laptop. Turns the laptop
toward the monitor. Taps on schematics and icons.
ON LAPTOP
Jagged flickers.
"ADAPT FREQUENCY FAIL."
"ITERRATIONS IN PROGRESS."
"FREQUENCY MATCH: 59%... 73%... 82%."
"CONNECTING TEST."
"CONNECTION FAILED."
He reclines in the wheelchair, disappointed. Watches the
glowing firepit in the courtyard.
Sisters advance in a file. Circle around the firepit.
He switches off the LED light.
Pulls a -- "2055 Grenache Abbaye de Sisterhood" bottle from
the wheelchair's side bag. Pours wine in a glass. Takes a
gulp. Watches the vesper ceremony.
EXT. COURTYARD - CONTINUOUS
New moon. The Moonlight Tower reflector shuts off.
The sisters throw incense in the fire. Embers flare. Smoke
rises.
Bare feet. Raffia-woven sandals. A pair of clanking clogs. A
pair of high heels.
Lumpa falls into a trance. Quivers, then stills. Crosses her
hands on her belly.
LUMPA
Madonna, Oh, Black Madonna,
Where is my place in this world?!
Tears stream down her glowing cheeks.
LUMPA
My soul heavy. Mind swirled.
LUMPA'S TRANCE
A gentle halo above BLACK MADONNA's head. Wrapped in a dark
blue mantle, she holds a BLACK BABY GIRL in her arms. The
baby -- curly hair tied in a conch with pink bow -- cries.
A tear runs from the inner corner of Black Madonna's eye.
She comforts the baby.
In the background, a gray, windy winter landscape. Cohorts of
disheartened people drag their feet on the path to nowhere.
BLACK MADONNA
(Lumpa's voice; soothing)
Blessed are you who weep now, for
you shall laugh!
The baby stops crying. Black Madonna smiles, embraces her
dearly.
In the background, the winter landscape SHIFTS to spring. A
meadow explodes in blossoms. People arrive, laughing,
dancing.
BLACK MOTHER
(lullaby)
Spring is coming, mark my word,
Tears dry and sadness die.
A New Baby, a New World,
Laughter's sun will rise up high.
The baby applauds, playfully.
END OF TRANCE
LUMPA
Our place in this world.
She opens her eyes.
Marie embraces her. The sisters surround them. Compassionate.
Lumpa bursts into laughter. Hard. Shakes Marie off.
The sisters step back.
Lumpa steps up on the firepit ledge. Disrobe. Her habit lands
in the flames.
Bra. Garters. G-string. High heels. Pregnant belly. Arabic
letters tattooed on her hip.
Domino lunges to save the habit. Collides with Marie, who
gets it first. Marie rushes to cover Lumpa.
Lumpa invokes the heavens.
LUMPA
(forceful)
Why must I cry first? I'm young and
beautiful!
Confusion spreads among the sisters -- except Zuzu, who nods
in agreement.
LUMPA
The Black Madonna sang to me...
about the baby born to end the doom
of sadness... to bring happiness to
us! Her song foretells spring, the
sun of laughter rising in the sky.
We need... laughter!
She LAUGHS harder.
The sisters brighten. Join in the laughter.
Domino fumes.
EXT. PLAYGROUND - DAY
Sunny day. Skirts swish, feet leap. Shouts of effort and
encouragement.
On the sandy patch near the orchard, Zuzu and Bob play
volleyball against Brighid and Facunda. Habits on, headpieces
off. Zuzu's habit tied above her knees.
Zuzu plays well. Facunda misses overhead passes.
Baudolino watches from the wheelchair. Domino sits on a
bench.
BAUDOLINO
Notice how quiet it is? Like the
war's over?
Domino raises an eyebrow.
DOMINO
Too quiet for you, hah? No drones
to shoot at... no excitement?
BAUDOLINO
Bah! Had excitement last night.
Didn't know your sisters could
laugh... that hard.
Domino stiffens.
DOMINO
(incredulous)
Did you --
BAUDOLINO
-- Yep! Couldn't take my eyes --
DOMINO
(stern)
-- Don't mention it. I'll
straighten that up with Lumpa. And
Marie.
Silence. They watch the game.
Facunda drops out. Nods at Domino.
Domino stands up. Lifts and ties the habit around her --
athletic legs. Sandals off.
Baudolino watches with increasing interest.
She strides to the court. Bends her knees. Clasps hands.
Extends arms. Follows volleys.
Brighid jumps, returns the most.
A pass arches above the net. A hand spikes it.
IN SLOW MOTION: Domino slams the ball. Like a pro. Lands
sporty.
Baudolino is aghast.
LATER
Sandals in her hand, Domino walks along Baudolino's
wheelchair. She wipes off the sweat from her brow.
BAUDOLINO
You may be a nutcase yourself. How
did you land in this place. And
your sisters?
DOMINO
Curious as usual. Let's keep our
secrets -- The truck from Saylac is
due tomorrow. It'll take you to
Lawyacado.
Baudolino stops.
She turns. A blank look on her face.
BAUDOLINO
Come.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - LATER
Baudolino points at the electronics on the desk.
BAUDOLINO
I couldn't make this work. I need
to get in touch with my people.
Domino waits in the door frame.
DOMINO
The driver has a phone.
Baudolino shakes his head. No way!
DOMINO
Fine. Follow me.
INT. DOMINO'S ROOM - LATER
In the middle of the room, a big canopy bed with sculpted
bedposts. Photos and posters on the walls.
She rests her hand on bedpost.
DOMINO
The only thing that I've kept from
my mother... and the memories.
He puckers his lips. Oh, well?
She walks to the courtyard side wall. Nods at -- the picture
of a well-off couple. The man with a colorful fez, short
trimmed beard. She, a chic woman.
DOMINO
My mother left France for
Somaliland.
In the next picture, two women, one in a nun's habit. The
chic woman, in a flashy dress.
DOMINO
My aunt... prompted me to study
theology... L'Institut Catholique.
Baudolino listens.
DOMINO
Teaching us how God created the
people and nature. Well, I
wondered! How about if Nature
created the People, who in turn
created the gods... and God?
She has a brief remorse.
DOMINO
That was a blasphemy. Even in
thought, God's punishment lies
heavy.
Recovers.
DOMINO
But I left, nevertheless. Landed at
the Rosicrucian Order seminary. San
Diego -- Played beach volleyball...
(guilty)
Had a bad experience with a...
(smirk)
Master. A man... of your likes.
Baudolino laughs. Deriding.
DOMINO
He was preaching theosophy. You
know... the intelligent beings of
the fourth-order teaching the third
order people how to experience
God....In exalted states.
BAUDOLINO
Did you?
He glances over at the -- Temple of the Rosicrucian poster
"Sane Mind Soft Heart Sound Body" motto.
Domino ignores him. Memories come alive.
DOMINO
My stepfather fixed up this place
from ruin. My parents were killed
later, in 2052....This place
destroyed again. The Emperor took
possession of the land.
She sits on the wooden bench by the window. Rests her hand on
a stack of NEWSPAPERS -- the photo of a monarch with "The
Emperor Fires Consortium" -- title page.
DOMINO
He gave me the concession to start
the convent, provided that all
religions are represented. Sort of
a... political decision.
BAUDOLINO
An apiarian then! He's weighing
each religion like a beekeeper
takes honey from every hive.
DOMINO
Apiarian?
BAUDOLINO
Like Jefferson. Whatever the bees'
colony has to offer.
DOMINO
Obnoxious Americans! Taking
advantage of others.
That's why, we French don't like
your kind.... And I -- your
advances are bad for me -- And you?
Who are you? Actually!
BAUDOLINO
(reluctant)
CIA. Undercover. Delivered some
goods. We were attacked, they fled,
I was... left behind.
Domino stands up. Go figure.
Walks to the ALL-IN-ONE COMPUTER on the wall. The display
comes to life.
ON DISPLAY: Domino's BIOMETRICS, LOGIN. Website launches.
"UNIVERSALIST SISTERHOOD-UNISIS CONVENT," "MISSION
STATEMENT," "INVITATION TO JOIN." Photos: convent, sisters,
handcrafts, bottles of wine.
A text scrolls in the Message Box: "Routes dégagées, arrivée
matinale."
DOMINO
(to Baudolino)
The roads are clear. The truck
arrives tomorrow morning.
She nod inviting him to the computer.
He gets in front of it.
ON DISPLAY: Baudolino' BIOMETRICS. LOGIN."Unknown User".
DOMINO
Permission to use.
ON DISPLAY: Baudolino's BIOMETRICS. LOGIN. BOOGLE browser
launches. URL box. Microphone icon. News photos.
BAUDOLINO
Fetch Unlimited Friendship
Organization.
ON DISPLAY: UFO website. World map. Dots on countries. Photos
of projects. LOGIN. ENCRYPTION. Communication APPS. In
SENDER window, Baudolino's biometric. RECEIVER window, black.
Message boxes under each.
He types in the message box.
DOMINO
Do you want me to step out?
BAUDOLINO (V.O.)
No need to. I'm only telling my
controller that you are a curious
sister.
She smiles. Walks behind him. Hand caressing his shoulders.
Without touching. Walks to the window. Looks at the stone
tower.
Eyes lock on -- the smooth, rounded off top. Emotions stir.
Lips part.
She fights off the emotion. Lowers her head. Ashamed. Fingers
Rosaries.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - MORNING
Lips mold a kiss. Baudolino dreams. Muffled noise of tanks
rumbling and gunfire rattling.
The convent's bells ring the alarm. Loud. He jolts awake.
EXT. GATE - MORNING
Noise of bullets hitting the gate. Baudolino rolls toward the
gate. The sisters scatter for cover.
ATTACKER #1 (O.S.)
(in Arabic; harsh;
subtitled)
Open the gate!
EXT. GATE INSIDE/OUTSIDE - MORNING
INSIDE
Gun belt strapped across his bare chest, baseball hat on,
Baudolino climbs the gate's stairs. Hands and athletics. Fits
the stilts on. Another salvo of bullets rattles against the
gate.
BAUDOLINO
(in Arabic; subtitled)
May Almighty grant you patience.
NOTE: All dialogue in this scene is in Arabic, subtitled,
unless otherwise noted.
He peers over the gate at -- THREE ARMED MEN, clothes slick
with crude oil. They chew. Waver.
BAUDOLINO
May Almighty also grant you clean
clothes.
Lumpa slips behind him, on the narrow board. She cracks the
door. Keeps her head hidden.
ATTACKER #1 (O.S.)
Foreigner! How dare you speak the
tongue of great Allah?
Baudolino lowers his head.
BAUDOLINO
(in English; to Lumpa)
They look like oilmen to me, not
terrorists.
LUMPA
(in English)
SoHo soldiers. Somali Holy Spirit.
Pure souls. Believe that oil
protects them from bullets.
ATTACKER #2 (O.S.)
Open the gate!
A spray of bullets rattles the gate.
BAUDOLINO
(In English; to Lumpa)
Why so unsteady? Drunk?
LUMPA
(in English)
Qat chewing.
OUTSIDE
ATTACKER #1(30s), burly and short. ATTACKER #2(teen), slim
and tall. They raise rifles. Swat flies.
ATTACKER #3(20s), handsome look, baseball cap, keeps chewing,
squints at the -- cracked door. Lumpa's profile barely
visible.
INSIDE
Baudolino sticks his head above the gate.
BAUDOLINO
Why not work the oilfields? There's
more moolah in oil than bullets.
OUTSIDE
ATTACKER #1
Joking shows foolishness and
arrogance, American man -- I see by
the hat you wear.
ATTACKER #3 whips off his baseball hat. Hides it in his back
pocket.
Baudolino's head above the gate.
BAUDOLINO
You seem to be an intelligent man.
Are you the leader?
The attackers raise hands. Exchange glances. Hesitantly, they
lower them.
BAUDOLINO
I know that your consorts do not
like your chewing qat -- And
believe me... the sisters in here
are more ferocious than your wives.
They asked me to tell you that it
was good for you to come, but
better was that you didn't come at
all.
The attackers argue. Attacker #3 motions to leave.
INSIDE
BAUDOLINO
So now I'm asking you, how can I
help you go away? By making you
laugh or cry?
Lumpa opens the door. Looks out.
Attacker #1 through the bars.
ATTACKER #1
Our Prophet says, do not laugh, for
laughing too much deadens the
heart.
BAUDOLINO
Not mine! I have no choice.
He pulls the gun from the holster. Lumpa grabs his arm.
OUTSIDE
Bullets churn sand at the attackers' feet. Attackers #1 and
#2 break, sprinting for the truck.
Attacker #3 lingers -- cocks his head -- flashes a sheepish
towards the door.
Lumpa's looks through the bars.
The truck revs. Chokes. Takes off. Attacker # 3 catches up,
gets in.
Bullets kick sand behind it.
INSIDE
Lumpa watches the -- truck shrinking away.
She turns to look at the alley.
EXT. ORCHARD'S ALLEY - CONTINUOUS
The sisters spill out from their rooms.
Baudolino strides toward them.
Looks down at -- Domino, who looks up. Applauding. Admiring.
BAUDOLINO
(to Domino)
Voila!
DOMINO
Fearless, hah?
SISTERS
Wunderbar! Subarashi! Meraviglioso!
Lumpa looks out through the gate's door.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - AFTERNOON
Baudolino waits in the wheelchair. Suitcase and pamphlets
packed. White linen suit on. In a farewell mood.
He glances around at the religious icons, posters, and
Trinity painting. The calendar on "May 2067".
Domino comes in. They look at each other...
DOMINO
The sisters... they say that you're
good for us, after all, a good man.
And that... you should stay as long
as you want.
BAUDOLINO
They want me for themselves, not
for my sake -- So much about
compassion. And you? What do you
want?
Domino paces the room.
DOMINO
The road was blocked. We'll have to
wait. Make the best of your time.
BAUDOLINO
That's what I wanted all along. To
make the best of the bees' nest...
actually of its Queen.
She stiffens. Relaxes.
DOMINO
I have to prepare the boxes for the
market.
She leaves closing the door, slowly.
LATER
Baudolino watches... the sunrays trickling through the waving
white draperies.
A knock on the door.
BAUDOLINO
(loudly)
Why knocking?
Domino comes in.
BAUDOLINO
Good manners, all of a sudden?
She raises an eyebrow. Curls a lip. So what?
BAUDOLINO
OK. Better question! How did
Rosicrucians, Curanderas, and
prophesying punks end up in this
bees' nest?
DOMINO
(proud)
I've got everything... an animist,
a Buddhist Reiki healer... a Muslim
sufi --
BAUDOLINO
-- Any pure Christians?
DOMINO
Marie -- Our New Age Faith has no
worship to impose or dogma to
propose. We believe that the
admission of the human thought's
diversity paves the way toward
universal harmony.
BAUDOLINO
Oh là là! Universal harmony again!
You say no dogma, but you just
stated one. I don't believe in
dogmas. I am a curious doer, not
dreamer.
DOMINO
Are you afraid of dogmas? --
Actually afraid of... anything...
in particular?
Baudolino hesitates. Domino waits.
BAUDOLINO
Just touching the --
-- Marie bursts into the room. Excited.
MARIE
Lumpa ran away.
EXT. GATE ALLEY - DAY
Marie and Domino walk by stacks of boxes and merchandise.
Fugi joins them.
DOMINO
(to Marie)
More trouble! You shouldn't have
brought her in.
MARIE
You liked her being a Marianist...
her Black Army of Lady Mary
sisterhood.
FUGI
Last time I saw her at noon.
The gate is ajar. Locking bar on the ground.
A truck's beep. Fugi opens the gate.
The TRUCK backs into the alley.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - SUNSET
DOMINO
Truck's here.
BAUDOLINO
She was in cahoots with one of the
attackers.
Domino,what?
BAUDOLINO
Lumpa! She knew the attackers. The
young one... lots of eyeing between
them.
DOMINO
You miss her?
BAUDOLINO
Not my cup of tea.
He rolls out. Without looking at her.
EXT. GATE ALLEY - SUNSET
The sisters offload pallets with grapes on the truck's ramp.
Upload stacks of boxes.
Marie pushes a cart with the white "Abbaye de Sisterhood
Wines" stenciled boxes.
Baudolino rolls by Marie, who looks away.
The sisters stop working. Watching -- Baudolino.
He waits by the truck's ramp.
Domino talks with the DRIVER (50), bearded man. She gets a
stack of newspapers and envelopes. Nudges toward Baudolino.
She joins Baudolino. Look down on him. He avoids looking up.
DOMINO
(soul searching)
We've never traded omens.
BAUDOLINO
You were not interested -- But
thank you for your hospitality.
He rolls up the truck's ramp.
The sisters look over. Pipi waves.
Marie raises a hand, hesitating.
DOMINO
(to Marie)
Men are humans though, you know...
as well. -- This one, fearless...
and fearful....
The track's ramp retracts.
DOMINO (O.S.)
(forceful)
Hold on, right there!
The driver sticks his head through the window. Wondering.
Open mouth. Teeth missing.
DOMINO
I'm interested!
INT. BAUDOLINO ROOM - NIGHT
Domino shakes her head in disbelief.
In the courtyard, ember smolders in the firepit. The moon at
the Waning Gibbous.
BAUDOLINO
... So, Pecker touched me and
dropped dead!
Domino acts dumb, plays smart.
DOMINO
There must have been something
wrong with... your Pecker!
Baudolino breaks into laughter. Surprised by the pun.
BAUDOLINO
It's not funny, actually. I'm
afraid!
DOMINO
By the power of God, you were made
to walk in life the way you want.
BAUDOLINO
Yeah, but there was no certificate
issued.
DOMINO
Well... the power of God is greater
than that of your... sha-show-woman
-- However, a true prophesy
warrants somebody's sacrifice!
BAUDOLINO
I see how the satisfaction of
curiosity fans your flames. Any
other way of flaming your flames?
Domino bends over. Her profile close to Baudolino's.
She lifts -- his chin. Her index finger. Looks into his --
crossed eyes.
DOMINO
You came back just for that, then.
Tell me, 'cause I can't see into
your soul... through your crossed
eyes.
She straightens up. Walks away. One last reproachful glance.
Closes the door. Slowly.
BAUDOLINO (O.S.)
Take one eye at a time!
INT. CHAPEL - LATER
Domino prays at the altar. Fingers a Rosicrucian rosary.
Facunda lights up candles. One at a time, under paintings and
symbols. Christian. Muslim. Buddhist. New Age.
DOMINO
Masters! Clear the eyes of my body,
soul, and mind to see the
brightness of God's clemency and
wisdom....May God forgive me for
breaking my tranquility by
listening to men's blasphemies. May
God help me distinguish between
false and true prophecies. May God
strengthen my resolve on the
crossroads ahead....And I will take
responsibility for what happens to
me and those around. Amen.
INT. WORKROOM - DAY
The sisters work on their crafts. Chat. Zuzu does her yogic
breathing next to the bike. In... and Out....
MARIE
(resigned)
If we get to like him more... he'll
break our hearts when he feels like
leaving.
Domino blinks, thoughtful.
BADIA
We were rewarded for the offered
hospitality. He was good to us.
That proves that the light of
beauty could shine in the darkness
of the ugly.
ZUZU
He's not ugly. Only his mind is F*
up.
PIPI
I'm making him short stilts.
FACUNDA
We should dispel the omen.
The sisters stop working. Marie crosses herself.
MARIE
Didn't we have enough with Lumpa's
blasphemy. And our evil laughter?
You want to bring yet another devil
into the house of God?
Discretely, Domino signals at Facunda and Badia who -- nod.
ZUZU
Lumpa had a prophesy that the world
should learn about. Over here, she
made us all laugh... maybe just a
sign of our daily deprivation.
DOMINO
Marie is right. Let us carry on
with our work.
She leaves the room. Facunda and Badia follow.
INT. CRAFTS STORAGE - LATER
The three sisters by the rack with artifacts. Facunda
rummages through boxes. Finds a Santos wood doll.
FACUNDA
We should be able to dispel it. She
is a sha-woman after all. But he's
not supposed to know about it. And
it must be at full moon.
DOMINO
We have to be careful, it's more
like... brain surgery. Clear the
fear, keep the strength of the
prophesy.
BADIA
I'll talk with Brighid. She knows a
few strong dispels.
INT. DOMINO ROOM - NIGHT
Baudolino sits in front of the computer and digital board.
Domino paces the room.
ON DISPLAY: Video and audio communication APPS. VOICE TO
TEXT, TEXT TO VOICE boxes, and MICROPHONE icon. SENDER and
RECEIVER BIOMETRICS: Baudolino's face, clear. Bobby's face,
warped.
BAUDOLINO
Looking good as usual.
BOBBY
Dhraagh goh warrrs baoue,
drajbourrrrteee Deerhtageres
fsahrrr --
BAUDOLINO
Turn on text and voice, both ways.
ON DISPLAY: Under Baudolino's SENDER, VOICE TO TEXT: "Turn on
text and voice, both ways."
BAUDOLINO
Sorry about the no-show.
BOBBY
(filtered; robotic)
Better like this. Russians bought
the land. Had to vacate the Italian
Center. Where are you now.
ON DISPLAY: Under Bobby's RECEIVER window, VOICE TO TEXT:
"Better like this. Russians..."
Texting keeps threading on both text boxes. Bobby's voice
robotic, no inflections.
BAUDOLINO
At a convent... a good sister
changed her mind. Allowed me hiding
for a while.
BOBBY
Brain deserted you in the desert.
Stuck under her habit.
Baudolino turns to look at the -- Rosicrucian poster."Sane
Mind Soft Heart Sound Body"
BAUDOLINO
No. It's about healthcare through
altered states. Ecstasy! -- Where
are you now?
BOBBY
Your aunt's patio.
BAUDOLINO
What? Wait... what are you doing
there?
Domino stops pacing. Catches up.
BOBBY
Couldn't escape tempting. Gorgeous
woman your Auntie.
DOMINO
Auntie?
BAUDOLINO
(to display)
Have to go now. I'll ping you
later.
He terminates the communication. Looks at Domino.
BAUDOLINO
Just one more little secret.
Changed your mind on trading
secrets? Omens?
DOMINO
If it doesn't cost too much.
She walks to and lies in bed.
He is surprised. Hopeful. He rolls toward the bed.
She laughs lightly. Waves him away.
DOMINO
(romantic)
Tired now....Tomorrow night...
under the full moon.
EXT. DESERT/CONVENT - NIGHT
A FULL, YELLOW MOON. A couple of clouds. Artillery flashes
beyond the dunes.
CONVENT
The moonlight washes the stone tower, Moonlight Tower,
Chapel's two domes, and the firepit.
Domino sits on the firepits' edge. Baudolino in his
wheelchair.
DOMINO
... but I want to ask you this ...
about Lumpa's --
BAUDOLINO
-- Oh, not again! Lumpa --
DOMINO
-- Wait. It's about her vision. The
Black Madonna prophesy.
Her palm rests on his leg. Her eyes visionary.
He looks at her hand. Then up at the chapel's two domes --
his mind shaping them into a promise.
DOMINO
The New Baby promising a harmonious
New Word full of laughter. The end
of the doom then?
BAUDOLINO
(hopeful)
Between us?
She smiles. Alluringly.
She leads the way to the reception building. Hand on his
shoulder.
INT. BUILDING - RECEPTION - NIGHT
She calls the ELEVATOR. Glances back.
He nods toward the -- stack of white boxes.
She digs. Go gets a bottle of wine.
They ride up.
CRAFT STORAGE - CONTINUOUS
Exit the elevator. Go through the doors to the hay storage.
HAY STORAGE - CONTINUOUS
Domino leads past the haystack.
He grabs her hand. Nods towards the haystack.
She shakes her head. Walks to the metal stairs to the
Moonlight Tower.
THE METAL STAIR
She steps up two treads. Waits for him.
He rolls and bumps on the stairwell. On purpose. Wonders at
her. "What now?"
She challenges him. "What, what?"
DOMINO
I was counting on your Cirque du
Monde abilities.
He concedes. Flips out of the chair. Upside down on his
hands.
Walks to the stairs. Tread by tread. Hands, one by one.
Climbs up.
Behind him, Domino supports his legs.
The moon highlights their silhouettes. Climbing up on the
metal stairwell. Struts. The glass and metal cupola above.
THE CUPOLA
Semidarkness. Domino backsteps on the floor, supporting
Baudolino's feet.
His hands, face and chest. Behind him, Domino's legs and
habit's skirt.
NUEVO TANGO
The legs step around the hands.
DOMINO (O.S.)
There is a platform right behind
you. Hand back until you feel it.
BAUDOLINO
Platform? The haystack was better!
Hands and legs step back. In line. In Sync. Tango like.
BAUDOLINO
Nuevo Tango!
DOMINO
Let yourself lie down on your back.
Slowly.
Body flips. Hands and head fling under Domino's habit.
BAUDOLINO
Promising landscape!
She yanks the skirt off his face.
DOMINO
Dirty mind.
THE SETUP
Baudolino lies on a pattern of square PHOTOELECTRIC PLATES.
Above, the cupola. Metal structure with FRESNEL LENSES. Some
broken, some intact.
The clouds clear the moon. The moonlight refracts through the
lenses. Concentric light circles fill the room.
A focal spot on his brow.
On the floor, thick cables running up on the walls.
Schematics and safety signs.
Facunda, Brighid, and Badia emerge from the darkness. Line up
at his feet.
BAUDOLINO
(agitated)
What's this now?
Domino shushes him gently. Sweeps his front with a small rug.
He inhales. Chokes.
BAUDOLINO
First RAPÉ ... now rape?
Slumps.
BAUDOLINO
(submissive)
OK by me!
Passes out.
Domino nods at the sisters.
THE FIRST EGG
Facunda cracks an egg. Lets its content drop in a jar with
water.
The yolk floats in the webby egg white.
She walks with it along Baudolino's legs and body. The yolk
sways. Round.
The jar above his head. The yolk grows spikes.
Facunda nods, knowingly. It's the brain!
The sisters acknowledge. Cross themselves.
THE BRIGID CROSS
Brighid places a -- Brigid cross -- on Baudolino's brow. On
the focal spot.
BRIGHID
Saint Brigid. You brought light to
the darkness --
-- Facunda spills the jar's water on the floor. Sparks fly
from cables. Smoke plumes from the control panels.
The sisters jolt.
BRIGHID
-- brought hope to the downcast.
May the mantle of your grace clear
the fog in this man's brain, bless
the hidden light of the prophecy
for harmony in this world.
THE WOODOO DOLL
Badia places a Voodoo Doll between Baudolino's legs.
BADIA
Papa Legba, gatekeeper of the
destiny's doors to spaces and times
on earth. Retrace and undo the
spell that wants this man to walk
above the ground or else die.
She sticks needles in the Voodoo Doll legs.
BADIA
Show him the door to a clean room
in his head and a happy future for
himself and all around.
THE SECOND EGG
Facunda breaks another egg into the jar's liquid.
She holds it above Baudolino's brow.
FACUNDA
My blessed Guardian Angel. I
believe, and I adore you. I ask
pardon for this man who doesn't
believe nor love. But he will!
I offer my love insofar to obtain
the favor of lifting the omens of
the duende.
Yolk stays round.
Facunda smiles at Domino, who crosses herself.
The sisters cross themselves and leave.
DOMINO
Domino kneels. Rosary between fingers. Leans her head above
Baudolino's.
DOMINO
Mother of God. Forgive my sisters
for their pagan rituals. Allow
worshiping of gods and the goodness
of their souls to starve the hate
between religions and dogmas.
Mother of God, shine in mercy,
might, and grace to heal this man.
Free me from passion, desire, and
ignorance. Make the prophecies of
laughter come true, make laughter a
unifying ritual to heal the souls
and brighten people's lives. Let us
enjoy the fruit of knowledge. Do
not exile us, for we need to
contemplate the heaven of the
Universal Consciousness.
Baudolino's eyes flicker open.
Domino stands up.
DOMINO
God made you walk in life the way
you want! You should be free from
the omen.
BAUDOLINO
He gets. Turns. Lets his feet hang. Looks at them. Then up at
Domino.
She waits with extended hands.
DOMINO
Up! Up! On your feet now!
Baudolino stands, unsure. Domino steadies him.
They wait.
Burst into a cracking laughter. Embracing in joy.
He baby steps toward the stairs.
First step down.
One more. Balance wavers.
Topples-headfirst.
THE VOID
His body vanishes down the stairwell.
DOMINO (O.S.)
(screams)
Aaaaeeegh!
BLACK.
INT. BAUDOLINO'S ROOM - DAY
Baudolino blinks.
In bed, he turns his head. Frowns at Domino.
DOMINO
You fainted.
BAUDOLINO
Must've been from excessive love
making.
He gets up. Looks down at his feet.
Domino hands him a mirror.
DOMINO
Look! As prophesized... laughter
cures everything.
His head's reflection stares back. Straight eyes.
He flashes a toothy smile.
BAUDOLINO
Vraiment? Is it perception or
reason that makes you believe in
prophesies?
DOMINO
Intuition is our forte... actually,
the premise of genius. If I believe
in a prophesy, it must be true!
Don't underestimate us... women.
He admires himself in the mirror. Again. Behind his face, --
afar, a blur of PYRAMID HEAD SHA-WOMAN.
BAUDOLINO
Wow! Women of genius. We men write
manifestos about equality, then
have to beg you to meet us in the
middle.
DOMINO
Ha! I know which middle you have in
mind.
She leaves. Waves him to follow.
INT. CORRIDOR - CONTINUOUS
They walk by the open door of the sisters' workroom.
Pippi and Marie wave at them.
INT. WORKROOM - CONTINUOUS
PIPPI
(to Marie)
... Lumpa was laughing. And we --
it felt good.
MARIE
Still, it was a blasphemy.
BADIA
Quite contrary. I feel it was a
true prophecy.
ZUZU
(in Yoga Dhanurasana)
A prophesy about laughing sounds
good to me. We should plan --
MARIE
-- God laughs at those making
plans.
PIPPI
(wondering)
But what if you don't feel like
laughing?
Zuzu inhales. Deep. Exhales slowly. Smiles.
ZUZU
It's easy. You just sit,
breathing... in, and out, fully
aware of the silence within. Listen
long enough -- and you'll start
smiling. Realize there's nothing to
smile for -- and you'll burst into
laughter.
INT. DOMINO'S ROOM - LATER
Domino and Baudolino in front of the computer.
ON DISPLAY: Piles of tires burning on the street. Drones
hoover overhead, dispersing rallying teenagers.
"Let us be!" "Go Away!" placards fall.
Tanks line the rim of a mining pit. Excavators and trucks
crawl below.
Scrolling titles: "Somali Holy Spirit Army takes possession
of North of Hargeisa Lithium mines..."
A NEWS ACHOR presents.
DOMINO
Sick and tired of it! Boogle!
Search for true prophesies.
ON DISPLAY:
"Symposium 2067-Fatima Third Prophesy,"
"AI predicts Doomsday this year,"
"JEE-SEATTLE 2067"
BAUDOLINO
Stop! Go back -- Seattle, what?
ON DISPLAY: Website, logo "JEE-SEATTLE 2067 Joint Essential
Eschatology Conference." Mission Statement. Schedule. Ads.
DOMINO
Right! That's what they do... sort
out true from false prophecies!
(in Latin)
FIAT RISUS, NON TENEBRIS!
(subtitled)
Let it be Laughter, not Doom!
....We have to fly to Seattle!
BAUDOLINO
(wishful)
Seattle? Hmm.
She waits.
BAUDOLINO
We could start from the Space
Needle Tower. It's disaffected now
-- but we could conclude... you
know... the Moonlight Tower
experience.
INT. SEATTLE AUDITORIUM - DAY
A 5000 capacity auditorium. Low balcony.
MEN and WOMEN in audience buzz with anticipation. A colorful
mixture of ethnic, clerical, paramilitary, business and
government people.
On stage CONFERENCE MASTER (60), clerical robe, and COMMITTEE
MEMBERS on chairs. Above, a LED BILLBOARD.
ON BILLBOARD
JOINT ESSENTIAL ESCHATOLOGY CONFERENCE JEE! SEATTLE 2067- THE
RIGHT TO PROPHESY FOR ALL
PROPHESY: WORD OF DEVIL
PRESENTER (60), short, white beard at the lectern. Cameraman
records.
PRESENTER
That's the time when the devil will
take over the Word of God, and
people will fall on the thorns of
despair.
BALCONY MAN(30), tattoos on the neck, stands up. Phone and
sandwich in hands. Shouts at Presenter.
BALCONY MAN
(mouthful)
We heard that 15 years ago --
AUDIENCE: Denial and agreement.
BALCONY MAN
Your prophesy infringes on the
copyrights of the previous art.
That's not a vision. It's just a
false prophecy! Enough with the
prophesies of doom!
FLOOR MAN #1 (50), business attire, shouts from below.
FLOOR MAN #1
The prophesy sounds original to me.
It just reinforces the previous
one.
The Balcony Man throws the sandwich at Floor Man #1.
FLOOR: Laughs and boos.
Conference Master BANGS his scepter on the floor.
ON BILLBOARD: LEDs burst in "3253 RED" "1017 BLUE" "85
YELLOW" "FALSE PROPHESY."
Brouhaha.
Presenter looks at the billboard. Slaps his papers on the
lectern. Papers fly.
Baudolino, signature white linen suit, and Domino, in white
habit, take over the lectern.
ON BILLBOARD: "PROPHESY: UNIVERSAL CONSCIOUSNESS ERA"
Domino raises a Victory Hand. The chatter subsides.
DOMINO
No doom!
AUDIENCE PEOPLE
No doom!
AUDIENCE: Victory Hands. Phones flash.
DOMINO
(protesting)
Why is it that we have an
Eschatology Conference? Only?
(funny) )
J-E-E-E!
Laughs.
DOMINO
(serious)
Since the 17th century we had only
one true, optimistic prophesy from
the Venerable Mary of Agreda. We
present now two recent, TRUE
prophesies coming through
channeling visions of a sister in a
Somaliland convent, and a shaman in
the Amazonian Jungle.
Domino invites Baudolino.
BAUDOLINO
The Amazonian shaman turns out to
be a sha-woman --
Men boos. Women Cheer.
ON BILLBOARD: Red dots. Blue dots.
Baudolino raises his hand.
BAUDOLINO
-- She regressed as Mama Quilla all
the way back to the glorious times
of the Inca people, to bring to
life the prophesy of Old Man
Creator of the World.
Men applaud. Nod at each other.
Baudolino calls for Domino at the lectern.
DOMINO
During the vesper of our
Universalist Sisterhood, the devout
sister of the Black Army of Lady
Mary, had the vision of Mother
Black Mary... and her true
prophecy.
AUDIENCE PEOPLE
Are you marketing your convent?
AUDIENCE: Murmurs and laughter.
ON BILLBOARD: Dots flicker, Change between red and blue.
DOMINO
Unlike the doom prophesies we heard
today, ours brings forth the cure
for it.
(pointing to outside)
We have THE KEY! The key to end the
DOOM! The key to start the ERA OF
UNIVERSAL CONCIOUSNESS!
Audience: Annoyance and disbelief.
DOMINO
Our submission has a great
political significance --
AUDIENCE PEOPLE
(angry)
-- No politics here!
Baudolino gestures to speak.
AUDIENCE PEOPLE
(impatient)
The key, what is the key?
BAUDOLINO
Politics is an issue because the
governments are entrenched in their
so-called... "administrative --
intelligence" in fact bureaucratic
--
PARAMILITARY MAN (45), shouts from a back row.
PARAMILITARY MAN
-- Our government has the best data
to predict the --
A purse hits Paramilitary Man on the shoulder.
WOMAN #1 (60), vision glasses, hits him again.
Military Man defends himself. Unwillingly, knocks -- her
glasses off.
A brawl between people starts. Skirmish spreads.
SECURITY FLOOR GUARD intervenes. Gets hit.
Calls for support on mic.
SECURITY ROOM - CONTINUOUS.
FOUR SECURITY GUARDS, three standalone MONITORS, and a MEDIA
WALL. DIGITAL KEYBOARDS on desks.
SECURITY FLOOR GUARD (O.S.)
(on speakers; filtered)
Sector T45, calls for support, I
repeat Sector T45.
GUARD #1 (40), stops playing the video game. Switches to,
zooms in the skirmish.
GUARD #2 and #3 eat in front of monitors.
GUARD #4 watches the media wall -- auditorium's interior,
exterior, TV channels.
GUARD #1
Support on the way. Will call
police to back up.
He taps on the digital keyboard. Nods to -- Guards #2 and #3.
Guards #2 and #3 stop eating... toss wrappings... wipe their
mouths... exit.
GUARD #1 (V.O.)
(filtered)
Deployment on its way to Sector
T45.
GUARD #4 glances at the outside building's scenes. Zooms in.
ON DISPLAY
MEN, WOMEN and KIDS families on the auditorium's lawn. E
BIKES. Blankets. Food. Watch phones.
On the street, RIOTERS wave "No Eschatology Doom!", "No
Apocalyptic Government," banners.
CROWDS from the surrounding streets join them.
ANTI-RIOT VEHICLES arrive. POLICE MEN in anti-riot equipment
deploy. Shields push back on rioters.
Guard #4 zooms in on a TV Channel.
ON DISPLAY: Wars in the world. Tickers scroll. "Middle East
on fire. "South America Confederation collapses". The anchor
comments.
Guard #4 switches back to the auditorium' feed. Zooms in.
ON DISPLAY: Domino looking at Baudolino, who...
AUDITORIUM - CONTINUOUS
...leans over the lectern.
BAUDOLINO
Yes! There was a dramatic
validation of the sha-woman's
prophetic revelation.
DOMINO
Let's lessen the crying and flare
joy --
AUDIENCE: Angry grunts.
AUDIENCE PEOPLE
(angry) )
The key! Give us the Key!
BAUDOLINO
People of the World, relax!
DOMINO
The key!... The key to Universal
Consciousness Harmony is....
Laughter! Laughter!
Silence. A cough. A chuckle.
Black billboard.
SECURITY ROOM
Guard #4 laughs uncontrollably. Zooms in on speechless faces.
Mouths agape.
GUARD #4
(to Guard #1)
Did you... did you hear that?
Zooms in on the dark billboard.
AUDITORIUM - CONTINUOUS
Dark billboard. Murmur grows.
Balcony Man wipes hands on shirt, laughing.
Floor Man #1 looks up, thumbs him. Starts laughing.
Woman #1 laughs heartily. Tugs Military Man's sleeve.
He forces a smile.
The billboard LEDs burst.
ON BILLBOARD: "3793 BLUE "1099" RED" "101 YELLOW, "TRUE
PROPHESY"
Cheers. Laughter. Waves of laughter.
The Billboard's dots wave in sync with laughter.
SECURITY ROOM - CONTINUOUS
Guard #4 switches to the exterior feed.
EXT. AUDITORIUM'S LAWN - DAY
Families on the lawn rejoice.
A BABY sucks on his thumb. Dried tears on his cheeks.
The rioters show phones to each other. Pat backs. Laugh.
Policemen drop the shields.
Rioters embrace policemen. Talk. Laugh.
SECURITY ROOM
Guard #4 watches the media wall.
Zooms in on a TV channel.
ON DISPLAY
Dancing celebrations and flags waving around the world.
Tickers scroll: "Peace treaty signed by...", Militia disarm
voluntarily in..." "Laughter prophesy spreads."
Feed cuts to studio.
PANEL ANCHORS comment, smile, laugh.
Ticker scrolls "JEE SEATLE LAUGHTER PROPHESY. TO BELIVE OR
NOT TO BELIEVE?"
Celebrations around the world behind them, on a large
display.
INT. CONVENT - DOMINO ROOM - NIGHT
Dim light. Sisters watch the news.
ON DISPLAY: "LIVE FROM THE JOINT ESSENTIAL ESCHATOLOGY -
SEATTLE 2067." The voting billboard "3793" blue, "1099" red,
"101" yellow. "TRUE PROPHESY."
SISTERS
Wunderbar! Subarashi! Meraviglioso!
Sisters applaud and laugh.
ON DISPLAY
Baudolino and Domino embrace.
Marie prays. A tear runs down her cheek.
MARIE
(whisper)
No doom.
MONTAGE – A HAPPY NEW WORLD 2069
EXT. RUSCHIN FEDERATION – MILITARY PARADE BOULEVARD – NIGHT
LED BANNERS flicker: "2069 – NEW YEAR GLORY TO RUSCHIN
HARMONY" above a freezing, floodlit high tribunes on the
large boulevard.
The CHINESE PREMIER and RUSSIAN PRESIDENT, wrapped in
ceremonial furs, clap and laugh.
Below, a ROBOT BATALLION marches. Perfect cadence. Dead eyes.
The COMMANDER ROBOT'S head fixed on -- the higher-ups
clapping and laughing.
COMMANDER ROBOT
Laugh!
Robots' head jerk right. Eyes flash. Jaws snap open. Laugh in
cadence.
BATTALION
Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!
Firework bursts.
LASER BEAMS shape two muscular arms locked in an eternal arm
wrestle. Tattoos of yellow stars on the red, red hammer and
sickle on the yellow arms.
The LED banner glitches "NEW G ORY TO US HARM"
EXT. PARIS - JARDIN DE TROCADERO - NIGHT
Parov Stelar like music beat. Tour Eiffel in the background.
Two large groups of PEOPLE dance a wide-funky, FOLK LINE
dance on the alleys. Perfect sync.
Hands clap. Balloons turn and jerk along. "We Love America,"
"The New Smile is Cheese."
"HARM-O'NICKS" music band -- bagpipes, violins, Moogs, drums
-- an improbable world band. Behind the scene, water jets
switch colors. In sync with the beat.
Fireworks explode above Tour Eiffel. A cluster of drones
forms "2069 New World Order." Disperse and regroup in
"Liberté, Égalité, e Fraternité Mondiale."
EXT. NEW YORK – TIMES SQUARE – NIGHT
Afro-Techno beats pulse. Crowds dance along Broadway toward
the CANAMEX TIMES -- the refurbished One Times Square.
Glowing advertisements shine and laser beams crisscross.
On the HALO-LED facade of the Canamex, top to bottom
advertisements. Gold coins cascade, grow larger and drop into
the "UNIVERSAL HARMONY," "VITA," "10% REWARDS." credit card.
The "GOOD YEAR 2067" Blimp crosses the sky behind Canamex.
The facade flips to "HEALTH, WEALTH, AND LAUGHTER". Below,
brain implants chips and colorful pills. "LAUGHING BRAIN
IMPLANTS," and "LAUGHING PILLS" taglines burst.
On Broadway, MEN and WOMEN twist and twerk in sync with the
beat. Breathing steam. Cowboy hats. Maple leaf plumes.
Mariachi sashes. Balloons jerk and bounce -- "TWERK NOT WORK"
and "MEN TOO."
Above the Canamex, a 3D HOLOGRAM: "2069 MISS CANAMEX" A
striking METISSE WOMAN.
Day of the Dead makeup, shirt with the Canadian Maple leaf
design, diamond-studded Uncle Sam sombrero.
A BALL the size of a handball glows magically in her extended
hands. She releases the ball. Countdown starts.
The ball descends. Grows bigger. Hovers above the crowd.
People take pictures. Smile. Laugh.
A BLAST. The ball explodes into a "2069 – HARMONY FOREVER"
blazing along the Broadway. People duck. FIREWORKS trace in
the sky.
EXT. SKID ROW – NIGHT
The firework flares illuminate the tents and carts decorated
for the occasion. HOMELESS PEOPLE cheer and scroll on their
phones.
A HOMELESS WOMAN (40s) laughs at her screen.
ON SCREEN: Emoji laughs back. "Ha! Ha! Laugh at that!"
FADE OUT.
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